Having A Good Relationship

Advice on Relationships How to Keep a Woman Happy

2010-09-18T10:48:00.000-07:00

Do you know how to keep a woman happy? Here is some advice on relationships for men.

The first advice on relationships item I have for you is to always be yourself. Many men don’t feel that they are good enough to catch a beautiful, sexy woman, so they put on a show. But a confident man is the sexiest beast around. Have you ever noticed that some of the ugliest guys have some of the prettiest women? That is because they display a level of confidence that is more attractive to women than physical looks.

Next, you should do the little things. This means offering to take her car in for an oil change or giving her a bag of Jelly Bellies (her favorite flavors) from time to time. Sometimes men think in terms of “grand gestures,” when it is the little things add up to long relationships.

This ties into the next piece of advice on relationships: appreciate her. You shouldn’t take her for granted. Let her know that you value her.

Next up is not obviously looking at other women when you are with her. Women think that you are comparing her to the woman you’re looking at. They don’t understand the whole concept of “the day I stop looking is the day I die.” This comes from the biological drive for monogamy in women. Women are looking for a lifetime partner for a man with whom they can raise children. They can’t help it. That’s how evolution designed them. So minimize the ogling, especially when she’s around.

You should try to make her laugh. While men list good looks at the top of the things they need in a woman, women list a man’s sense of humor. So, if you want the relationship to last, keep her laughing.

The next bit of advice on relationships comes in seeking common interests. It’s great if you got together because of a hobby or an interest, but it still helps when you take an interest in a long standing passion of hers. If this means developing an appreciation for foreign films, so be it. This shows that you care about her and she’ll know you are one in a million.

Once you get the girl, it may seem like you don’t have to try anymore – at least as far as grooming goes. And, while women are less sensitive to looks than men are, they still like a man who makes an attempt. So, shave on weekends. Keep in touch with the latest fashion trends for men. In short, don’t get sloppy just because you’ve landed her. You can unland her just as easily.

She’s going to need to know that she can integrate you into her circle of family and friends. A man must be part of her larger life, especially after the first few weeks of passion are over. So, make an effort to get along with her girlfriends and impress her parents. A woman relies on her social network to validate her relationship choices. Make an effort.

You should always be considerate of her feelings. Women are less stable than guys. Part of this is hormonal. When you are sensitive to her mood, you won’t get on her bad side.

The final piece of advice on relationships is to be open to trying new things. At the beginning of a relationship, everything is new from the types of dates you arrange to the way you kiss. But, after a while, these things become routine. If you find that your relationship has fallen into a rut, shake things up. Try something new. It will go a long way to keeping your relationship healthy.

Avoiding A Love Break Up

2010-09-13T02:36:00.000-07:00

If you’ve ever had your love break up you know how painful it is. And if you thought back after the relationship ended, you probably saw all the signs that you didn’t recognize before. If you’ll remember those signs and keep them in mind, they can help you prevent a break up in the future. And they can also help you get back together after a split.

One sure sign of impending love break up is the lack of physical contact. This doesn’t just mean sex. If your partner suddenly stops having an interest in sex, that’s a good sign that a break up is coming. But the normal flow and rhythm of a relationship has times when there’s lots of sex and times when there’s not much. This is natural.

A love break up is probably on the horizon though, if your partner stops holding your hand for no apparent reason. Or he or she stops putting an arm over your shoulder at the movies or in public when he or she always did it before. Any sudden changes like not touching you much outside the bedroom when your partner was always very affectionate before could signal problems.

If it goes beyond not touching to the person actually becoming uncomfortable at your touch, then you definitely need to have a conversation with your partner about what’s going on. Don’t just assume that because your partner flinched away from your touch that there’s about to be a love break up, though. Many things can cause a person to not want to be touched at any given moment.

A person might have been thinking of something else and been surprised or startled by the touch. He or she might think that your touch signals that it’s time to have sex, if you’re not very affectionate except when you want to be intimate. And maybe your partner isn’t in the mood for sex now and chose to show you that by moving away from your touch. That doesn’t mean you’re headed for a love break up.

Your partner might simply not feel good. Every change in a person’s behavior doesn’t signal an impending love break up or even anything wrong with the relationship. You have to watch them closely for a while to determine if some behavior is an occasional thing, something brought on only during certain times, or if it’s a permanent part of the person’s make up.

Catching your partner in lies, even what seem like small and harmless ones, could be a sign of problems, too. After all, if a lie is small and harmless, why tell it in the first place? Where there’s one tiny lie, larger and more damaging lies can grow. Don’t become convinced it’s a love break up right away though. People lie about many things that aren’t bad, like surprise parties and reunions. Your partner might be trying to keep a harmless and fun secret like that, instead of scheming about a love break up.

2010-08-12T01:47:00.000-07:00

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Why Buy The Cow When You Can Pay For Better Milk?

2010-03-18T00:57:00.000-07:00

There’s a very interesting study profiled by the BBC recently about how most men who pay for sex already have a partner. Check this out…

The BBC Reports:
Glasgow’s Sandyford Initiative analysed data on 2,500 men who attended a sexual health clinic. One in 10 said they had paid for sex.

Of those around one in four said they repeatedly used prostitutes, 43% had a partner and 20% had a sexually transmitted infection.

Data collected between October 2002 and February 2004 appears in the journal Sexually Transmitted Infections.

The researchers warned that their figures could be an under-estimate of the true numbers who pay for sex.

They found that over half of those men who admitted paying for sex had done so while abroad, while 40% said they had paid for it locally.

An interesting finding of the study was that the majority of the men who pay for sex use condoms, except when recieving oral sex, and that there was a relatively high occurance of STDs with this group – none of which was HIV, however.

But on a bigger scale, why is it what the majority of men who pay for sex already have a partner at home? (This is one of the questions women just don’t want to know the answer to.)

In my humble opinion, it’s because the guy who goes looking for it elsewhere isn’t getting what he needs from his partner. In other words, the chick he’s with isn’t “putting out enough.”

Sure, there may be a “dog” factor in all this, as in men just can’t keep it in their pants. But that may only account for a small percentage. I think the bigger problem is that men wind up with a partner they’re not happy with, or their partner stopped trying to please them or meet their sexual needs.

Men are sexual beasts, damn it! We need it at least once a day. And if our cravings aren’t met, we look for it elsewhere. Frankly, I’m not shocked at these statistics. I think most married men find sex workers convenient because you don’t get any crazy “stalker” girlfriends coming along and ruining your family/marriage/relationship, whatever. As Charlie Sheen used to say: “I don’t pay hookers for sex, I pay them to go away.”

But here’s the thing: I really don’t believe in cheating on your partner. If you’re unhappy, you either have to take steps to fix the problem, or break up and find a better match for yourself. None of this “sneaking around” bullshit. You’re together with your partner for a REASON, and if your needs aren’t being met, either do something about it or leave. Don’t just SETTLE because you don’t think you can do any better or your scared of being alone. Would you rather run the risk of getting (and passing along) an STD than just DTB (that’s dump that bitch, for those of you not hip to my jive) and move on with your life?

Part of what I love about what I teach in the Art Of Approaching is that it’s EMPOWERING. It gives you control over an aspect of your life that was previously thought to be uncontrolable.

In other words: Be a man, go for what you want, and do not settle for anything less!

Dating For Men Over 40

2010-03-06T18:49:00.000-08:00

I found a pretty interesting (yet pattently depressing) article in the St. Paul Pioneer about men over 40 who are having trouble in the dating scene.

Nhia Tongchai Lee writes:
Second chances at love don’t come often when you hit your 40s.

That’s what many single men in that age group are finding out. Dating now has become a challenge compared with when they were in their 20s.

John Drysdale, 46, divorced in 2001. He says finding someone his age who is educated, single and ready to settle down is a rare thing.

“The demographics are definitely different,” says the southwest Minneapolis resident. “When I was in my 20s, everyone was single and in the same boat. Now, the majority of people I know in their 40s are all married, and here I am — single again.”

Going to bars to meet new people was out of the question for him. “I didn’t know where to go anymore,” he says. “Single people my age are not hanging out at the pub and social clubs. The availability is limited.”

Hate to break it to you, but dating is ALWAYS a challenge. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be a “game,” would it? But the number of men who are getting divorced or finding themselves suddenly single later on in life IS going up. The problem is, men over 40 are falling back on how they tried to get women when they were younger, and what works for younger guys isn’t always the best tactic for guys who are more mature.

For instance, club going. Going to clubs and bars to pick up chicks is a young man’s game. Not to say older guys can’t do it, but you have to pick the right scene. Go to a bar or club that caters to college students, you’re going to stick out like a sore thumb. But go to a bar that caters to the “happy hour” professional crowd, and that may be more your speed.

But personally, I hate the bar/club scene for picking up. It’s good for dates and going out on the town with a chick, but it’s a competitive and high-energy pick up environment, and guys who are out of the game for a while can find it difficult to go back into.

In the case of this article, the guy in question was looking for women “his age,” meaning over 40. Chances are, any woman at that age worth her salt probably has been married before and has some kids – and you can bet your ASS they’re not going to bars and clubs.

As far as I see it, there are really only 2 choices for men over 40 looking to get back in the dating game.

If they’re looking for women their own age, they MUST go online. That’s where most mature, single women who are too busy to go out congregate to look for Mr. Right. That’s not to say you can’t go out to certain events or venues and find these women, but this is the easiest route.

The second option is to go for YOUNGER women. Many women find older men more attractive, and if you can put up with the experience level difference, I’d suggest going for single women ranging from 26-33, and there are TONS of places you can go to find these women.

But remember: Old men can’t try to pick up women like guys in their 20s. Sure, the psychology of attraction is the same, but the methods are a bit different. So the first thing you got to do if you’re over 40 and looking for love, is to forget about everything you did when you were younger that worked, because it won’t all apply to you anymore. A lot of the personality/attitude stuff is the same, but you have to keep in mind who you’re going after, and where you now are in your life.

If you can do that, the rest should be easy.

-- Get any girls your want now! --

How To Write A Good Online Dating Profile

2010-02-20T18:56:00.000-08:00

The American Chronicle (you know, that online bastion for solid dating advice) has an article up telling people how to write a good, content-rich online dating profile. Check it:

Pradeep Aggarwal writes:
Are you trying to find the man or woman of your dreams? Online dating can help you find your potential date. You need to write a personal ad or a dating profile which will give you an opportunity to select your soul mate. An online dating ad which is written clearly is informative and full of good content will fetch you quality responses.

We find certain profiles on online dating sites which are written spontaneously and they lack creativity. These kind of profiles will lead you to attracting the wrong kind of person. The common mistakes that people make in their dating profiles are mentioned below. Read them carefully and avoid repeating these mistakes.

The dating profiles have sentences like “I am a witty person having a great sense of humor” Instead of that you could write something humorous in your profile. Sexual innuendos should be avoided as it gives a wrong impression the first time. Write something romantic instead of writing that your are sexy and flirtatious.

Avoid using adjectives like honest, lovable, creative, and imaginative or that you have an above average IQ while describing yourself. Instead mention that you are an artist or a musician etc. It is also important to present yourself in positive manner. You could write that you like reading or mountain climbing or walking by the beach instead of saying that you are bored so you wrote this ad.

Show a positive attitude to online dating. Mention that you are interested in meeting new people who are interested and having common interests. Avoid writing that you are interested in the guy who makes you laugh (shows a depressed side of yourself). You are not looking for a clown to make you laugh but you are looking for a Date.

Mention your preferences clearly. Don’t write that you are interested in fair complexioned women but maybe if they are dark but attractive you may consider. It is a turn off to both the women.

The Ad should reflect your positivity and should be informative and rich in content. A well written Ad will always give you success in getting a good response to online dating.

All in all, not some bad advice. But if you really want to get a heads-up on your internet dating skillz, there is no other option – go to the Insider Internet Dating website and learn from Dave M. The guy is a MACHINE I tells ya! I’ve never seen anyone pull more online ass in my life. DM’s got the goods, and his tactics put Pradeep’s to shame.

-- Get Any Girls You Want Now! --

Ass Worship?

2010-02-10T08:24:00.000-08:00

Yet another bizaar fettish I don’t really understand…

From Hoes.com:
No, we’re not talking about eating p*ssy or licking ass. We’re talking about women sitting their asses right down on a man’s f*cking face like it’s a barstool. His face is literally engulfed in ass, almost to the point of suffocation. In most cases, these submissive men are laying on their backs when a woman walks over either fully clothed, with panties on or bare ass nekkid, planting her lucisous ass on his face, covering both his nose and mouth. Still can’t see the difference between facesitting and eating p*ssy? Look at it this way. You can’t eat p*ssy when someone is sitting on your face. All you can do is hope she stands up before you pass out from not being able to breathe.

Yes, this seems like a healthy endeavor for men to partake in.

NOT.

I really believe there’s a damaged psychology that goes along with men wanting to be “dominated.” There’s a kind-of submissiveness forced upon men by society, media, and even parents nowadays that too many men just accept and secretly harbor. Male energy is an AGGRESSIVE energy. We were meant to be hunters. We were meant to be strong, to be protectors. So why is it that there are men out there who want to be dominated? Suffocated to death by ass? (How would that look on a coroner’s report? Admittedly, I can think of worse ways to go…)

-- Learn The Killer Methods To Get The Girl Your Want! --

Do You Think Girls Don’t Find You Attractive?

2010-02-04T05:21:00.000-08:00

There are lots of reasons guys get frustrated with the process of dating women.

Not the least of which is the idea that there is something about them that is unattractive to the opposite sex.

Look, we all have things about us that we don’t like.

(After all, we know ourselves better than anyone else.)

But here’s the thing…

IF YOU LET YOUR LOOKS DETERMINE YOUR HAPPINESS, YOU WILL NEVER BE HAPPY!

There is no such thing as “Perfection.”

You will always be either too fat, or too skinny, or too bald, or your ears stick out a little bit too much…

There will ALWAYS be something about yourself that you don’t like!

But the simple fact of the matter is this – just because YOU don’t like it, doesn’t mean others won’t.

You never know what physical attributes women will find attractive. So why try to obsess over what you THINK they won’t like?

I used to think that just because I’m overweight, that meant girls wouldn’t like me.

But I’ve seen TONS of overweight guys who had smoking hot girlfriends!

And I used to think that, if they could get a girl being fatter than me, then I could most certainly get a girl too!

You know what? I WAS RIGHT!!!

For every shortcoming you think you have, take a look around. Chances are, there’s some guy out there with the same shortcoming who’s succeeded with it.

Let me share a secret with you…If you don’t think you’re a good looking enough man, there are 2 THINGS you can do to overcome this sabotaging way of thinking.

The first is to focus on things about yourself you DO like.

Women always compliment me on my eyes, my smile, and my laugh.

So instead of focusing on the stuff I don’t like, I focus on the positive aspects of my appearance.

I make sure not to wear glasses or sunglasses when I’m out to meet women, because I want them to see my eyes. (I also make strong eye contact)

I smile alot, and try to laugh a lot when I’m with a girl.

In short: I put my positive traits up front and center!

The second thing you need to do is be aware that CONFIDENCE trumps LOOKS 9 times out of 10.

Don’t believe me? Ask any girl what they find most attractive in a man, and 90% of them will say “confidence.”

If you have confidence, nothing else matters.

So how do you get and/or improve your confidence?

Well, you can start by reading The Art Of Approaching – DUH!

I go into EXTREME detail on all the tricks and tactics I used to go from a whining, sniveling, wussy to haveing iron-clad confidence with women.

Seriously, this makes ALL the difference!

-- Get The Girl Your Want Now! --

Why Men Are Single

2010-01-27T07:46:00.000-08:00

It’s a question everyone should be asking themselves:

“Why are so many men single nowadays?”

Seriously. There are so many single guys out there, and even worse, there are a great number of men out there in relationships they are UNHAPPY WITH!

So what is the reason for this strange and unsettling phenomenon?

I’ll tell you: Too many men are taught the WRONG THINGS about women.

This is a real epidemic. Worse that SARS, Bird Flu, or the Black Plague. This is bed because this wrong knowledge makes a WHOLE lotta men (and women) very unhappy. Face it, being lonely SUCKS. And the only thing worse than that is being with someone who makes you miserable.

Yet, we find that is the case time and time again.

So what’s a guy to do?

Simple. Learn the RIGHT WAY to deal with women.

See, I truly believe that Feminism, and the effect it’s had on society, has really messed up men’s ability to deal with the opposite sex. Society has a way of mentally castrating men when it comes to how they should interact with women. Too many guys just don’t know how to be the type of man women want, and because of that, they either can’t attract them, or have to settle for what they can get.

This is BAD.

Not just for men, but for women too, because a man who can’t please a woman makes the woman just as unhappy.

Men need to realize that EVEYTHING THEY’VE EVER LEARNED ABOUT WOMEN IS WRONG! They’ve been sabotaged by the mainstream media to believe a lot of lies and mis-information about what you have to do to attract women.

Here’s the bottom line, because I could write about this topic for hours: BE A MAN.

Go after what you desire, without appology. Do not be afraid of or appologise for your sexual desires. Do not be shamed by other people’s opinions of your efforts with women. Do not look for validation based off of a woman’s opinion of you. Treat girls like human beings, not special goddesses meant to be worshiped. Stand up for yourself, and be confident in who you are and what you want.

When this happens, you might find yourself in a good relationship sooner than you think.

-- Get A Girl Tonight! --

Get Laid Fast!

2010-01-21T07:43:00.000-08:00

It’s the biggest question on every man’s perverted mind. “How Do I Get Laid Fast?”

Screw getting laid slow! I’m lazy and impatient, and I wanna get laid NOW! NOW DAMN IT, NOW!!!

Well, short of the obvious way of going out and getting yourself a hooker, how can you possibly get laid fast? Well, I guess you have to define what you mean by fast.

Are you talking “fast” as in “immediately, right this second?” Or are you talking “fast” as in “After I meet a girl, I want to know how to get her into bed the quickest way possible?”

If it’s option A, nothing short of the hooker or f-buddy option is going to suffice. If option B, there are a few tricks you can use to increase your chances of speeding up bedroom gymnastics.

First of all, you must avoid the mistake of talking when you should be acting. What I mean by this is, many times, the girl is ready to go ahead and start making out, when the guy is still trying to figure out how to keep the conversation going. Learn to read Body language and identify the signs when she’s ready to be kissed! (The best way to do this is to check out my book by clicking here. I go into great detail about this stuff.)

You also want to add a sense of scarcity into the situation to put on some pressure for the sex to happen. Something like “Tomorrow we may never see each other again, and we’ll never know if it was meant to be…” could be appropriate. But regardless, find a way to add in some urgency into the situation. A famous line used by a lot of military guys is “I’m getting shipped out tomorrow and may never come back…” (lol, no surprize that works like a charm).

You’ll also want to display an “I live by the moment” attitude. One where you embrace life and want to experience all it has to offer, and you give her the opportunity to do so with you.

You also have to “Take the Lead” in the interaction. Don’t leave things up to her. Women (and most people in general) don’t like to make decisions. They like to feel “swept off their feet.” Take her by the hand and lead her to your car. Take her in your arms and kiss her. Start planning what she wants for breakfast in the morning. Just ASSUME it’s going to happen.

Finally, be prepared to deal with her objections. Things like “This is moving too fast,” “I have to work tomorrow,” and “I have a boyfriend,” are a few things you’ll need to be prepared for. Objections are a way of safeguarding herself from making a mistake, you just need to answer her objections in a way that makes her feel it’s okay to proceed. You can do this be agreeing with her objections, offering alternatives, or making them into a joke.

For example:

Her: “This is moving too fast!”
You: “Yeah, your right. We should really slow down…” (continue kissing her like nothing happened)

Her: “I have work tomorrow.”
You: “I do too. I’ll just have to make sure you get home at a reasonable hour.”

Her: “I have a boyfriend.”
You: “Good, he can make us breakfast in bed in the morning. But if the Orange Juice isn’t fresh, I’m going to have to club him.”

So as you can see, if you do all of the above successfully, there is no reason you should’t get laid fast.

-- Learn The Magic Of Approaching Girls! --

Women Advice From Billy Bob Thornton…

2009-11-14T16:09:00.000-08:00

How would you like to get women advice from the guy who married Angelina Jolie?

No, I’m not talking about Brad Pitt, I’m talking about the older, uglier dude who landed her before Golden Boy got his sloppy seconds.

I’m talking about Billy Bob Thornton.

In a recent issue of FHM (the one with naked Janet Jackson on the cover), there’s a short article about Billy Bob’s upcoming movie, School For Scoundrels.

In it, Billy Bob teaches a bunch of hopeless geeks how to be more confident and meet women…

(Kind of like what I do, but I don’t think my customers are geeks. =)

In the very short interview with Billy Bob, I found this excerpt most interesting:

From FHM Magazine:
Q: In School For Scoundrels, you teach a class of nerds how to pull chicks. What do you wish you knew before starting out with the ladies?

BBT: That you shouldn’t get married if the girl asks you. That’s happened to me a few times. With women, you have to be confident, but not cocky. They like confidence with a certain vulnerability.

Now, I agree with Billy Bob on this one.

Sure, saying “You gotta be confident” isn’t a big revelation to you, I’m certain, but hear me out…

Billy Bob makes a very good distinction here, which is confidence with cockiness, and confidence with vulnerability.

Now, what do you think he means by that?

(Don’t worry, I’m about to tell you…)

Here’s my distinction:

Cockiness is about disregarding anyone’s thoughts or emotions but your own. When you’re cocky, the only reality that matters is that which exists in your own mind.

Now, there IS something to be said for being cocky. A little bit of cockiness can be attractive in a man.

BUT…

Being vulnerable is about being emotionally available.

And as we all know: Emotions are like COCAINE to chicks! They can’t get enough of them!

Displaying a bit of vulnerability allows you to establish emotional connections with women.

THIS is what gets them “into” you.

Seriously, once a woman has established a deep emotional connection with you, you’d have to admit you’re a baby-killer to get her NOT to sleep with you!

THAT’S how powerful this stuff is!

And that’s how Billy Bob landed ol’ Angelina in the first place.

So what does this mean to you?

Well, in the course The Art Of Approaching, there are two things that no one else out there even seems to touch on:

1. How to build and establish your confidence.

2. How to create strong, lasting emotional connections with women.

Billy Bob does it naturally. you don't have to learn it the hard way.

BUT, it is learnable! Anyone can do it!

-- How To Approach The Woman You Like --

Why It's Important To Pay Attention To Women

2009-09-06T13:10:00.000-07:00

One of the most common complains women have about men is that they just don't PAY ATTENTION.

Seriously, have a girl ask you "Are you even listening to me????" or better yet, "You're NOT listening to me!"

C'mon. you guys all been there before.

Well, the ladies do have a point. It is very important to PAY ATTENTION.

Now, I'm not saying you gotta start listening to everything the ladies say. Actually, I'm saying that you have to start paying attention to how they RESPOND.

I call paying attention to how a woman responds to you "calibration." By allowing yourself to see how she is reacting to what you're doing, you give yourself the information you need to either escalate what's working, or fix what isn't.

This is very important.

And it ALWAYS applies, no matter what the situation. Whether you're just meeting a girl for the first time, or you're out on a date, or you're in bed together, you always want to be calibrating.

Calibration mostly has to do with the reading of body language. You gotta pay attention to the signs she's sending you (even though she may not know she's sending them!).

For instance, say you see a girl standing around with her arms crossed, and she's got a big scowl on her face, and looks like she's having the worst day of her life. That will help you decide if you want to approach her, and how to approach her.

Would you want to approach a girl when she's all closed off and negative like that? Or would you prefer to look for an easier target?

If you decide you do want to approach her, how would you go about doing it? Maybe you could ask her "What's wrong, you look like you lost your best friend?" Then go about cheering her up or making her laugh.

When you're talking to a girl, pay attention to what she's giving you. Is she leaning back? Looking away? Not really engaging in conversation? Then she's not that into what you have to offer her.

But what if she's leaning forward? Are her pupils dilated? Is her head tilted? Is she playing with her hair? Smiling a lot? Is she touching you?

If so, then chances are what you're doing is working and you should be doing more of it.

Women will tell you exactly what you need to do to get them. You just have to PAY ATTENTION!

Once you've got that down, you'll be able to tailor your approaches to each individual woman and make them much more effective!

If you want to learn how to meet any woman you want, no matter what your looks, age, or financial standing may be, check out the book The Art Of Approaching right now by clicking below:

Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here!

After all, meeting a woman is the first step to romance!

And if you REALLY want to supercharge your success with women, be sure to take a look at the Advanced Course here!

-- Get Art Of Approaching Now --

Easy Conversation Tactics

2009-09-06T13:03:00.000-07:00

Think about this:

What is some of the most awkward situations you can be in?

Most people would agree, it's 'Uncomfortable Silences'.

What if you trained yourself to NEVER be uncomfortable during these embarrassing situations.

Or better yet...

What if you learned to use them to your advantage? Guess what, that's a VERY novice technique.

Meeting women is really the art of starting a conversation, and keeping that conversation moving in an interesting direction.

Too often, guys will "open" a girl, only to run out of things to say to her.

But when you know how to "stack" your openers so your conversation keeps flowing effortlessly, you'll be surprised how easy it is to keep a girl interested in you.

In the Art Of Approaching course, you will learn simple techniques like this that will COMPLETELY blow your mind. And I believe in that so much ...

Seriously. These will be the best darn dating techniques you've ever read,

See how, right here:

-- Check Out The Art Of Approaching Women Now --

How To Meet A Woman When She's With Her Friends

2009-08-18T15:17:00.000-07:00

Some of my guy friends have been asking me : How to make friend with her when she's with her friends?"

Let me make one thing clear right now that you must understand before you go out trying to meet women:

WOMEN OF BEAUTY ARE NEVER ALONE!!!!!

You heard me right. Pretty girls have a very high social status.

They are almost always surrounded by people, be they girlfriends, boyfriends, male "nice guy" friends, brothers, sisters, parents -whatever! They will always be in groups of people.

It is very rare to see beautiful women alone. And when they are alone, they're usually waiting for someone!

The common term I refer to people who like to hang around with beautiful women is: OBSTACLES.

If you imagine you're on a race track, and at the end of the track is this girl you want to meet, all the rocks, hurdles, holes, and booby traps between you and her are OBSTACLES that can ruin your chances of meeting her.

But there is a way to navigate that minefield and avoid all these obstacles! That way is called:

GROUP THEORY.

Group theory is a system by which you actually address the girl's friends instead of trying to ignore them.

Through group theory, you win over the girls peer group and turn them into YOUR support group.

Here's how it works...

The girl you want to meet is always with her friend, right? And you're worried that you can't approach the girl you like because the friend will interfere in some way.

So what you do is forget about the girl you like, and approach her friend first!

That's right...

YOU FORGET ABOUT THE GIRL YOU LIKE AND APPROACH HER FRIEND FIRST!

Now, this doesn't mean you're going to try and pick-up the obstacle instead of the girl you really like.

It just means you're going to overcome that obstacle before you reach for your prize!

Remember: You must disarm a land mine before you step on it!

You do this by acting disinterested in the girl you're really interested in, and focus on winning over the girl you don't really care for!

Then, once you've won over the obstacle, you ask if you can "borrow" her friend for a minute because you've been neglecting her.

Once her friend gives you approval to talk to her alone, guess what? You've just gotten her STAMP of approval!

This means that the girl you like has no reason NOT to talk to you!

Then, you pull her off to the side, and work your magic one-on-one.

There are more group theory and various other tactics on meeting women in the book The Art Of Approaching: How To Meet Any Woman, Any Time, Anywhere You May Be!

If you want to have the skills to meet beautiful women no matter what, click below now:

--Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here--

Don't be afraid

2009-07-29T20:38:00.000-07:00

When it comes to your relationship with your ex, are you afraid to put yourself out there? Would you like to ask them out again, but you just don't want to risk the rejection?

If you are, I don't blame you. It can be nerve wrecking and sometimes it feels like the risks are just too high.

What if your ex doesn't feel the same way you do?

What if your ex doesn't respond?

But then again, what if your ex does feel the same way and has been afraid to take the first step as well?

What if your ex *would* respond positively and both of you could take the next step towards reuniting?

If you ask me, the risks are worth it. It's worth giving it a try.

There's two ways you can go about it.

The obvious way: You can simply contact your ex and ask them if they would like to go out sometime. Depending on your circumstances, this may or may not be a good idea. If you feel you both have reached a point in your reconciliation where it is safe - go for it. If you're unsure, then try something a little more
subtle.

The subtle way: Next time you are talking with your ex, say something like - "I'm starving, want to go grab a bite"? It's less formal, and it moves things forward without putting yourself out there *too much*. That's just an example, but it works with any situation. Pick an activity your ex enjoys. "I'm going for a run later, want to join me"? "I have to go shopping at the mall later, want to join me?" You know your ex better and you know what he/she likes and doesn't like. But you get the picture.

In order to get back together with your ex, action will need to take place. At some point, either you or your ex is going to have to accept the risk and *go for it*.

How do you get to the point from breakup to being able to ask your ex out again?

Check out HERE

What Women Want In A Relationship

2009-07-11T20:52:00.000-07:00

Now that's a loaded question if I ever heard one, lol.

Here's the thing...

Different women have different expectations about what they want from a man and a relationship.

For example, a young woman may not know what she wants in a relationship simply because she isn't experienced enough to know what's important to her yet.

A more mature woman, one who's been in a lot of different relationships, may know exactly what she's looking for
in a relationship.

But there's one thing all types of women know about before they get into a relationship...

They know what they're ATTRACTED to!

See, the female mind processes things in this manner:

1. Is there something attracting me to this man?

2. Will this man be a good fit for me in the long term?

Usually, number 1 will kick in almost immediately within the first few minutes of meeting a man. They'll start evaluating the man's attraction quotient.

Number two won't kick in until number one has been met.

This means that if you can get a woman really turned on, or even in bed, then she'll immediately start evaluating you
based on your potential for a long term relationship.

Women who try and do this backwards, by getting into a relationship and hoping the attraction will grow, usually end
up disappointed.

When it comes to what women are actually looking for in a relationship, you can expect these factors to come into play:

1. How well does the man treat her?
2. What is the level of attraction occurring?
3. How good is he in bed?
4. How strong is the emotional connection?
5. How good of a provider is he?

Let's quickly go through these five female relationship factors...

The first factor can be misleading. All women want to be treated well, but they don't necessarily want to be treated like goddesses to be fawned over.

(Sure, that's okay from time to time, but too much of a good thing is a bad thing...)

Women want to feel like the man they are with is loving and strong. So if you treat them in a way where they know you care, know they are safe, but know you won't take their bullcrap, they will feel well treated.

The next factor has to do with what we discussed earlier. If they are still feeling sexual attraction towards you, then this factor is met. But if things have fizzled, this could be a deal breaker.

Most women aren't used to having men who are good in bed. So if you can please her between the sheets, then chances are she'll see you as a "keeper."

If there is a strong emotional connection, a woman will want to be around you. She will feel connected to you and want to please you. This is a very important factor in any relationship.

Women who don't have a strong emotional connection to the men they are in a relationship with will tend to cheat on
them, because they aren't being fulfilled emotionally.

Finally, a man who is a good provider will make a woman feel safe and cared for.

Many women will gravitate towards men who can pay their bills, even if all the other relationship factors are absent.

But this doesn't mean that type of relationship is a happy or stable one (for either party).

Showing a woman you're a good provider is probably the least important factor in a strong relationship, but it is still a
factor.

But the first step you need to be aware of before you can even begin to THINK about relationships, is the initial ATTRACTION phase.

And that phase starts with how you MEET her.

I personally believe that any man has the potential to attract any woman.

If they know what to do.

In the book, The Art Of Approaching, you're going to learn some super-ninja techniques that will lay the foundation for a great relationship.

You'll learn how to plant the initial seeds of attraction that will blossom into a good relationship.

Just go here: Check Out The Art Of Approaching Now!

Do You Suffer From "Nice Guy" Syndrome?

2009-07-07T19:57:00.000-07:00

Guys, I have a question for you...

Have you ever heard that old adage "Nice Guys Finish Last?"

Well, I'm here to tell you that saying is 100% true! But not for the reasons you may think.

Being a "Nice Guy" with women doesn't work, not because you get too caught up in what a girl wants and get stuck as a friend, but because Nice Guys are typically very, very...

SELFISH!

That's right. When you're a "Nice Guy," you're not really being nice, you're being EMOTIONALLY GREEDY.

Let me explain...

One of the biggest problems guys who are struggling with women face is something I like to call "the Nice Guy factor."

So many guys have such a weak identity and so little self-esteem, that they base their own self-worth on what other
people THINK OF THEM.

These guys are at the mercy of everyone else in their lives, so they try their best to please the people around them,
hoping they'll continue to think highly of them, so they can feel good about themselves. That's not so bad, right?
It feels good when others approve of you, doesn't it?

Most people look at this behavior and would instantly categorize these poor men in the "Nice Guys" column.

After all, they're the ones who don't like conflict. They're the ones who don't want to make waves. They're the
ones who want everyone to be happy.

They are also some of the most selfish people on the planet.

Seriously. I know this because I used to be one of these people, and I know all their dirty little secrets!

And the point of this newsletter is to make everyone who thinks of themselves as "nice" or as a "victim" really, really
pissed off!!!

All of you "Nice Guys" out there reading this are nothing more than "people pleasers." Somewhere in your life, you found out thatpleasing people is a way to get other people to like you and admire you so you can feel good about yourself.

Whether it was the acclaim of your parents, or the acceptance of your friends, somewhere in your time on this planet YOU LEARNED to feel good based on what other people think of you.

But I'm here to tell you that using other people's feelings and goodwill like that is not only harmful, but dishonest!

Anyone who says "I can't stand conflict!" or "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!" should do us all a favor and move to the planet "Ideal" where life is wonderful, we all have transparent heads, and there is no war.

Only on this planet will you be able to find that everyone is willing to give you the moral support you need.

But that's the crux of the issue right there. All you "Nice Guys" have a losing mentality about your need for support. Your methodology is: "I am so loving and giving and nice, I expect you to treat me the exact same way as
I treat you!"

Here is the typical thought process of Nice Guys:

--"Don't disagree with me! It's not fair because I do so much for you!!!"

--"Please be sympathetic and comfort me when I'm upset! I'm needy and can't comfort myself."

--"Always be in a good mood. I am always trying to make you happy and if I can't, I feel ashamed and mad at you!"

--"Pay attention to me when I need it! I've earned it after all I've done for you!!!!"

--"Take care of me by doing what I'm afraid to do! I take care of you, so you need to return the favour!!!!"

Look at those thoughts above, and ask yourself "If someone was saying that to me, how would I react?"

Now you know where women are coming from when they don't want to have relationships with "Nice Guys."

Once that happens and the needy demands of "Nice Guys" go unmet, they fall into the deep pits of self-pity and depression.

They also feel a lot of shame and anger at their failure to please the women they want, and though these "Nice Guys" can keep their pleasant demeanor up for a long time, their resentment of the women they want to please will grow and grow until it explodes in anger and rage, either directed at others, themselves, or both.

This kind of mentality can extremely damage your self respect and cause others to not want to be around you.

So what's a "Nice Guy" to do?

If you want to have success with women, you need to stop being agreeable and instead be straightforward and honest, especially when you have to go against the wishes of others and disappoint them. You can do this with
kindness and sensitivity, but you MUST do this nonetheless.

Only by being honest, with yourself and with others, will you be able to overcome the selfish "nice guy" habits you have adopted in your life.

And when you do this, you will stop caring about what other people think of you because the source of your validation comes from the fact that you're being true to yourself and straightforward with others, and you will cease to harbor resentment and anger, and have more self respect and less depression.

That is the only way I have found to truly stop being a "Nice Guy" and become the type of man other people can respect.

It can be hard being honest with others (especially yourself), but in the end it is far more rewarding than any other
behavior you can adopt.

Your first step on the road to being that type of guy should be to read the book The Art of Approaching.

Don't Live In Self-Pity Or Play The Victim

2009-07-03T08:43:00.000-07:00

I once stopped by an old friend's house and as soon as I walked in her house I felt a wave of negativity and darkness come over me. Right away I regretted stopping by.

This friend proceeded to complain about a number of things, including what was wrong with her life, the people in her life, the government... you name it. I was determined not to fall into this hole of pity and I changed the subject at every opportunity. Unfortunately, this only seemed to make her try harder to convince me of the imaginary ills in her life as a way of validating her self-imposed status as a "victim." She had built a prison for herself based on her self-pity and negativity.

You might say she was the result of her own self-fulfilling prophecy. She was a victim simply because the thought of herself as a victim and lived her life accordingly.

The more time I spent with her, the more I felt my energy draining. After 20 minutes before I couldn't take it anymore and I left.

Many people who endure a hard breakup fall into a cycle of self-victimization. It's one thing to have a "pity party" for yourself every now and then as a way of dealing with the pain. It's quite another to hold on to that self-pity and never let go - which is what I believe my friend has done.

Let's role-play for a moment. Consider yourself in the role of my friend, constantly feeling sorry for yourself and creating your own world of pity and negativity. Now consider your ex in the role of myself, stopping by to pay you a visit. I don't think I have to tell you what this type of behavior does for your chances of reconciling with your ex. Do you think you're ex will want to spend any more time with you than they have to?

Even if you are in a relationship, be aware of your moments of self-doubt and pity. It's better to talk with your loved one about your problems in a true effort at resolving your problems, than to go around feeling sorry for yourself all the time.

Continuous self-pity and self-victimization is really destructive to our overall well-being. And most of all it is a choice. It's a choice to complain about our lives without taking any responsibility for them. Last I checked, our lives are our own and we ultimately are responsible for them.

Life will knock you down sometimes, but the choice to get up or stay down is our own. No matter how bad things get, there is always hope.

None of us are perfect, including your ex. Make the decision that, with or without your ex, you're moving on and you are going to lead a positive happy life.

The next time you see your ex, do you want negativity to surround you? Do you want to suck all the energy from your beloved, leaving him or her tired, anxious or stressed after your time together? Or do you want to radiate positive energy (read Win Back Love for ideas) so that you are giving energy instead of leeching on it. After spending time with you, your ex will feel energized, uplifted and maybe even inspired. Easy choice.

Don't mire yourself in self-pity or make yourself out to be the victim. No In the long run, it's really bad for your emotional health, not to mention the damage it does to your relationship.

If your best efforts at getting back together, aren't working. Consider a new approach. Try the ideas and techniques HERE instead.

Don't make your ex jealous

2009-06-26T18:51:00.000-07:00

Trying to make your ex jealous is one of the most common forms of manipulation. It's a way of saying "You may not want me, but my new guy/girl wants me."

I've seen many relationship gurus support this idea as a way of returning your love to you. They think your ex will realize how much they like you and will come crawling back.

Don't buy it. I've seen this backfire many times. It may work initially, but soon enough you'll be right back where you started.

Why jealousy doesn't work: When you're ex sees you with a new "love interest," they might conclude any of the following...

1. You are no longer available. Any lingering doubts they have had are now replaced with a clear sign they should move on, and perhaps find a new love themselves.

2. You are clearly trying to make them jealous, or you are using this new person as a rebound. In either case, you run the risk of looking immature, which is obviously not an attractor. If your ex sees through your plan, you efforts to get back together are dead.

3. Initially, either consciously or sub-consciously, your ex may wonder how they stack up against your new love interest. They may even wonder if they are good enough for you. And for the sake of satisfying their ego, they may get back together with you.

This is what some of the so-called experts have tried to sell. In most cases you will not get back together and for those rare cases that do get back together, their chances for staying together are slim.

That's because, once you're back together your ex's ego (and any doubts) are satisfied. Once you're back together, they realize the other love interest you had, was just a passing fancy and doesn't stack up to them. And they realize that no, you are not too good for them, as you took them back.

And once the thrill of "the game" is over, they are left in a relationship that is the same as when you both broke up. I've rarely seen a relationship stick in this situation and almost always ends up in another breakup.

Let's look at the real issue. You want to get back with your ex. You want to restore love to your relationship with your lost love. It stands to reason then, you should do things which help you reach this goal. In other words, you should do things which foster positive feelings about you and not do things which foster negative feelings about you. That may sound overly simple, but I think it needs to be said sometimes. Often times after a breakup, our emotions grab a hold of us and we don't know up from down and left from right.

In the 3 examples listed above, none of the examples results in the ex feeling emotions of real love or attraction towards you.

Jealousy isn't one of the feelings you should want your ex to feel. Jealousy can lead to resentment, which will spell disaster for any plans of reconciliation.

If your best efforts at getting back together, aren't working. Consider a new approach. Try the ideas and techniques in the Magic Of Making Up instead.

Is Meeting Women A Chore For You?

2009-06-21T05:26:00.000-07:00

You know what? When you're single, meeting women can be a real chore.

Seriously, it almost gets to the level of being a "full time job." Going out night after night, going to club after club, bar
after bar, facing rejection after rejection... it's hard to do.

And because it's hard, it can get frustrating.

People can sense that frustration on a man. Most men can, and women DEFINITELY can.

One thing to remember is that you project your attitude to the world at all times.

If you look like you're angry and frustrated and bored, people aren't gonna want to be around you because you'll drag them down into your mood.

But if you go out with ulterior motives to meeting women, like going to a club because there's a band there you want to see, etc., you put yourself in a position where you can enjoy yourself whether you meet women or not.

Now, we all know it's hard to project that "happy-go-lucky" attitude all the time. And it's especially hard to do it at will.

That's why, if you're doing things you enjoy, you don't have to worry about WORKING to feel good, because it'll come naturally.

And you'll be able to carry those feelings with you wherever you go.

Remember this: A guy who's having fun is INFINANTLY more attractive than one who isn't.

That is why the "fun factor" is very important to meeting them!

See, women are empathetic creatures by nature, they are more in tune with their emotions and the emotions of people around them.

When you're having fun and projecting that energy, the women around you will pick up on it and be drawn to you because it's a pleasurable energy, as opposed to being frustrated and nervous, which almost always pushes others away from you.

So remember to do things YOU like and have fun. Eventually, the women will come around.

But what about the times you simply aren't able to have fun? What then? Should you just count out women all together?

Of course not.

Being able to turn emotions and feelings on and off is what is commonly referred to as "State Control."

Actors in movies and TV are very adept at this, which is probably why they're so successful. They can control what they feel and how they interact with others AT WILL.

Imagine what it would be like to instantly "turn on" those feelings of fun, excitement, and sexuality. For a moment, imagine how women will react to you when they feel your energy while experiencing those states.

Can you imagine that this is a valuable skill to have?

State Control all comes down to how well you know yourself and are able to BE AWARE of what you're feeling at all times. And this comes down to your "inner game," which encompasses things like confidence and beliefs.

Most guys have a lot of trouble with their inner game. They feel stuck, helpless, afraid... and all those emotions lead to the same frustrations that drive women away from you when you're not having fun.

So what's a guy to do if you happen to be one of the unlucky ones that's "stuck?"

The answer: Get Your Inner Game Together!

I know, I know, this is easier said than done. I mean, if it was easy, therapists would be out of a job, right?

Well, it is possible. But it takes hard work.

So if you're not willing to put in the time and effort it takes to get your inner game in shape and enjoy the wonderful feelings of supreme confidence and the belief that you can achieve anything you want, then stop reading this email right now.

Seriously. Stop reading this, delete it from your inbox, and go on with your life the way it is. I won't be mad. I promise.

You're still reading this?

Congratulations. That means you're probably unhappy with your current inner game, but you're willing to put in the work it'll take to fix it up.

Of course, inner game isn't something that can be fixed overnight. But it CAN be done.

Go to this link now: HERE

How to FINALLY turn the tables on your breakup

2009-06-18T02:17:00.000-07:00

OK, the time has come to take massive action. It's time to drastically shift the direction your breakup is headed in and it's time to get her to come running back.

Everything we've gone over up until now has been leading to this one VERY IMPORTANT step you're about to take. This step is going to completely turn the tables on your breakup... literally overnight.

Now I've been holding out on this until now because I wanted everything I had to say to you to really sink in. That's because with the proper mindset this strategy becomes 300% more effective.

So, are you with me? Good. Then let's press on.

Remember the other day when I asked you how fast you thought this breakup would end if you could get
her to feel a burning need to be with you? You know, that burning need that you feel for her?

Well the time has come to put her in YOUR shoes and pave the way to getting back what rightfully "belongs"
to you.

How?

It's simple and it's all about rejection and the reaction to that rejection we've been talking about.

Remember when I told you that the reason you feel such a strong urge to be with her (perhaps stronger
than you'd normally feel) is because she was rejecting you?

Now consider this... what if YOU were to hand HER a healthy dose of that rejection? What do you think
would happen?

I'll tell you what:

---> the relationship would instantly take a 180 degree turn and she'd start making steps to come towards YOU. Then it would just be a matter of time until she made it the whole way there and you'd be together again.

Now as a strategy this is very simple but be warned: there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it
(it can completely backfire if not executed properly).

That's why I've taken the time to create, document, and further perfect this strategy which I've laid out, STEP-BY-STEP, in my best-selling book:

"How To Get Her Back For Good - A Shortcut Strategy For Getting Your Girlfriend Back Without Using Tricks, Tactics, or Manipulating Mind-Games"

If she's still resisting your every attempt to make things right and everything you're doing feels like you're crashing into a brick wall, then you need visit the link below and devour every page in this book:

HERE

I promise you that when you see how all the pieces of the puzzle fit together, you'll no longer be asking yourself, "what am I doing wrong?" and they'll be no more doubts in your mind about what to do next.

Growing Apart - Keep It From Happening To You

2009-06-15T11:24:00.001-07:00

What is "Growing Apart," Anyway?

In Part 1, I told you that marriages either grow or weaken. If you put no effort into your marriage, you're not maintaining it: you're letting it deteriorate.

Similarly, all the time you're either growing apart or growing together. If you are not communicating, not touching, and not spending time together, then you are growing apart.

It's amazing how few people really know their spouse. Do you know who your spouse's biggest role model is? Do you know the one book or CD your partner would want to have if he or she were stranded on a deserted island? Do you know what his or her favorite color is? Do you know exactly what your spouse does at work?

Getting to know someone truly, inside and out, takes effort. Most of us prefer learning more about our own preferences, opinions, and ideas than those of our spouse. Yet a strong marriage is one where both individuals make an effort to find out what is going on inside their spouse's head. They appreciate, understand, and respect that information.

Growing together means sharing together. It doesn't mean thinking alike, or avoiding conflicts, or not having disagreements. It doesn't mean that neither of you ever changes. Growth, by definition, is change. A healthy marriage is one in which both people mature and change their ideas, perspectives, and plans. The trick is to share those changes openly and honestly with your spouse as they occur.

When you grow together, you share what you're thinking, feeling, and hoping for. You don't remain the same person that your spouse met. Instead, you find new hobbies, new passions, and new jobs that keep your life exciting and always surprising. Even when your new direction seems to lead in an opposite direction from your
spouse, it is usually just old perceptions that makes it seem that way. Spouses can be resistant to changes in their partner, because they see it as a sign that their partner is dissatisfied with things as they are. Reassure your spouse. Whatever new direction you take, you need to involve your spouse fully and ensure that nothing will cut into your couple time. Changes are frightening, but when there is communication, honesty, and willingness to compromise at every step of the way, change can be an enormously positive thing.

Let's look at the example of Joan and Michael. For the first five years of their marriage, Joan stayed at home while Michael worked. She found herself gaining weight, getting bored, and listening enviously to her single girlfriends about their adventurous jobs and experiences. At first, she blamed it on her marriage. Then, a
frank friend reminded her that her marriage vows didn't include a promise to do the same thing 'til death do you part. That night, she told Michael that she wanted to go back to work and try a three-month subscription to a gym. He was horrified. He thought it meant that she wasn't happy with how he provided for the family,
and that the only reason she could possibly want to go to the gym was to look good for another man. They had a huge argument, and Michael forbade Joan to go job-hunting. The stress in their marriage was at a breaking point.

It took the intervention of their pastor before Joan and Michael could sit down and discuss their feelings without getting upset. Joan told Michael that she needed to keep growing and trying more out of life, but that she wanted to do it with him, not without him. Michael confessed that he worried that Joan would meet
someone new if she started working outside the home. Their pastor encouraged both of them to continue talking openly and honestly and involve each other as their life changed. As a result, Michael decided to join the gym along with Joan. Joan's new job gave both of them much more to talk about in the evenings, and their
communication improved. Too, the extra income gave them more money to go out and do activities that they enjoyed. Ultimately, the change that Michael feared actually strengthened their marriage.

Michael and Joan learned some valuable lessons.

(1) When one partner suggests a change, the other partner often feels indirectly criticized, thinking that the other person means that status quo is not good enough. Reassuring your partner is essential during this tough time.

(2) Sometimes it takes professional help (such as a pastor or marriage counselor) to get you talking about how you really feel.

(3) Any change that can be undertaken mutually (such as both Michael and Joan joining the gym) is better than a change that can only be undertaken individually.

Are We Incompatible?

When both partners don't communicate or share life changes, they can wake up one day and find themselves sleeping next to a stranger. The question is whether those differences are enough to break your marriage apart or just right to add the spice to your marriage.You didn't marry your partner to get a carbon copy of yourself. Chances are that the differences between you and your partner sparked your interest and made each one of you fascinating to the other. If he's artistic and you're analytic, or you're impulsive and he's rational, you are likely to be complementary personality types who bring out the best in each other.

Major incompatibilities involve more fundamental areas, like your values, goals, and vision for your marriage. If you and your partner differ significantly in your upbringing, the importance you place on family, and your need for and ability to express physical affection, you may have a more difficult time accepting and negotiating your differences. This is why cross-cultural relationships can be so challenging. If your partner is from a significantly different culture from your own, you will need to be extremely open, understanding, and flexible in how you approach resolving marital issues.

Here are some other areas where significant differences (note: not all differences are significant) can prove challenging:

- Differences in the importance you assign to religion, work, family, free time, children, and money.
- Differences in how you spend, save, and manage money.
- Differences in your ideas about whether you should have children and how many. If you have children already, differences in your ideas on how to raise them.
- Differences in how often you prefer sex and the kind of sex you enjoy.
- Differences in your bio-rhythms (such as whether you're a morning person or a night owl).
- Differences in your expectations about gender roles.
- Differences in the types of friends you enjoy.
- Differences in how you prefer to spend your spare time.

If you are at the point in your marriage where you think that you and your partner have become completely incompatible, it is worthwhile to invest in a marriage counselor. Counseling is much cheaper than a divorce and provides a neutral environment where both partners feel comfortable opening up and examining their true feelings.

The Importance of Reading Your Partner

After living with someone for a long period of time, we learn a lot about their moods, their facial expressions, and the subtle nuances of communication that a stranger would not be able to pick up. All of us know that nonverbal communication is much more powerful than the words we say, but in a marriage situation partners tend to play a "war of words" rather than realizing what's really going on.

Try the following game. At least six times during the day, look at your partner and try to guess what emotion he or she is feeling. Don't base your guess on his or her words. If possible, pick a time when neither of you are saying anything. Notice his or her lips: are they clenched, relaxed, upturned, or tight? Notice the eyes: are they narrowed, focused, sleepy, open? Notice clues in posture (stiff, slumped, relaxed) and how he or she holds his or her arms (crossed in front, loose at sides, on lap). Compile a list of your partner's emotional expressions in your mind so that eventually you'll be able to tell how your partner is feeling just by looking at him or her.

By reading your partner's mood before he or she says anything, you'll develop a more intimate bond and move closer to the marital "mind-reading" that long-term couples develop after years and years together. You'll be able to respond to your partner's moods in an appropriate way rather than expecting your partner's mood to match your own.

The ability to recognize your partner's emotions without verbal cues will help you meet your partner's emotional needs in a way that would be impossible if you just went by what your partner said. Often, your partner will say one thing but be feeling another. This is not because your partner is lying to you; it may
be because your partner wants to deny his or her feelings to him- or herself. It may also because your partner hasn't recognized that emotion in him- or herself. Don't make the mistake of believing that you know your partner better than he or she knows him- or herself, but do use your instincts wisely to be there more fully for your partner.

If you think that your partner is worried, upset, or tense, set the stage for your partner to feel comfortable sharing with you using the techniques you learned in Part 4. Tell your partner that you noticed they seemed tired or upset and ask them if they want to talk about it. If they don't, that's okay. Just remind them that you're there in case they feel like talking about anything.

If we ourselves are tired or upset, sometimes the last thing we want to do is notice that our partner is tired or upset, too. Our own emotions can make us blind to the emotions of our partner. That's why it's so important that you develop the skill of "reading" how your partner feels. Once you become accustomed to doing it, you won't be able to turn your new "eyeglasses" off. You'll read your partner's feelings whether you want to or not.

Mid-Life Crises

A mid-life crisis occurs when a person reaches middle age and suddenly rethinks the priorities and life decisions that they've made thus far. They may make a complete and drastic change in their life, swinging 180 degrees from who they were before, in an attempt to take advantage of the second half of their life before it's too late. They may feel a desperate panic to discover something they think they've missed and, as a result, give up everything they've achieved thus far--stable job, marriage, family--for an amorphous "something" that they think they can't get with the life they have now.

Many marriages end during this time. Affairs skyrocket as spouses seek reassurance that they're still physically attractive. It is a trial for any marriage, and navigating through it will require all of the communication, love, and intimacy skills you possess.

Understanding what is happening is the first goal. If your spouse can recognize that he or she may be struggling with a mid-life crisis, your spouse has taken the first step towards minimizing the damage that the crisis can cause. I recommend personal counseling at this time so that your spouse can discuss his or her priorities, regrets about the past, and how he or she envisions the future.

Being flexible and playing along with your spouse's need for novelty may help. Suggest lifestyle changes that will satisfy your spouse's need for a change in priorities without abandoning your marital lifestyle altogether. Allow your spouse to talk openly, even if what he or she says is critical of the life you have shared together. The more your spouse can share his or her thoughts and feelings, the closer he or she will feel to you as the only one who understands what he or she is going through. Although this will be a difficult time for you, it is even more difficult for your spouse, so be understanding.

There's no "magic bullet" for keeping marriages together during the mid-life crisis, but the stronger and healthier your relationship is before it hits, the more "armor" you have to protect it.

Cheater Cheater - Affair Repeater

2009-06-14T13:52:00.000-07:00

It hurts when someone you love betrays you.

If infidelity has happened to you, you know the hurt.

If it hasn't tainted your marriage you can only image what it must
be like to know that your spouse is with someone else.

Discovering infidelity in your marriage will shake your world.

And, here's one of the problems.

We don't know much about infidelity. We may have our ideas and
opinions, but to understand the complexity and depth of betrayal is
beyond most of us.

Your friends or family may scream, "throw him out!" But this isn't
always as easy as it sounds.

Especially when you've been married for years and have children
together.

Nobody is prepared to face an affair when it happens in their
marriage. That is why it is CRUCIAL that you receive good advice.
That is why it's important to have great information.

Here's a top-notch resource I recommend from an online colleague
and friend, Dr. Robert Huizenga - the infidelity coach.

If you:

>want to affair proof your marriage
>are confronted with infidelity in your marriage now
>know a friend/family member struggling with infidelity, or
>are hungry for in-depth, practical insights about relationships...

Infidelity and the betrayal of a loved one rocks those involved.

Discovering infidelity in your marriage will leave you living on
the edge of "craziness," on the verge on going bonkers.

Now, if you are the one discovering the infidelity of your partner
or spouse, you not only will be racked by pain and fear but you
probably won't have much of a clue of what to do.

But, what to do? Not many of us have had a course in surviving
infidelity.

Not many of us are prepared to face the possibility of infidelity
in our own marriage.

If you are a friend or relative trying to be helpful, you may want
to say, "Throw him/her out!" because you're not sure what else to
say. And, also, doesn't it pain and leave you speechless when you
see in his/her eyes the going bonkers fear?

You're not sure how to respond, because you too, haven't had a
course dealing in infidelity.

Or, you have a burning desire to learn about relationships. You are
looking for in-depth, pratical inisights from a professional with
clinical experience and training. You want your marriage to be well
grounded, as rich as it can be and you want to affair-proof your
future with your loved one.

Happiness Is A Resource

2009-06-14T12:01:00.001-07:00

Here's a thought for you before today...

Too often in life we think of happiness as a destination.

We say things like:

"When I make this much money, then I'll be happy."

"When I live in this town, then I'll be happy."

"When my ex comes back to me, then I'll be happy."

"When _______ happens, then I'll be happy."

You could probably think of hundreds of variations of this same idea. The idea that we can be happy later, depending on a condition.

While all of those things may actually bring happiness, there is no need to wait. You can be happy right now.

I realize you are going through a tough time right now. Going through a breakup is one of the hardest things we have to go through in our lives.

The feelings we have don't go away quickly, but rather, they can last for a considerable time, depending on the situation.

But that doesn't mean you can't find happiness. Instead of thinking of happiness as a destination, consider it as a resource.

Happiness can be felt from smiling to a stranger. Returning money you find on the street and giving it to it's rightful owner will make you happy. So can taking your dog for a walk.

I'm sorry, I hope this doesn't seem like I am trivializing happiness. I'm just trying to point out (as someone special to me recently pointed out to me), happiness is a resource and we can find it in many forms throughout our day.

And most often, it's these small opportunities that present themselves throughout the day that, if we are paying attention, are good opportunities to find joy. When you're going through a breakup, you can use all the joy you can find.

And speaking of joy, I wish you all the joy in the world, and I hope you have a absolutely wonderful day.

Want to get your ex back? Check out HERE

How To Flirt With A Woman To Get Her Attracted To You

2009-06-14T11:39:00.001-07:00

By now, you should know how to engage a
woman in conversation.

Now, though that's an important skill to
have, it's only HALF the battle.

The other half of the battle is moving
from the MEET to getting her ATTRACTED
to you.

Have you ever seen any of those cheesy
dating shows on TV? You know the ones
I'm talking about, where a camera crew
follows a guy and a girl around on
different dates and sees if they're
going to "hook up" or not?

I must admit, these shows are guilty
little pleasures of mine. But you
can actually learn a LOT from
watching them.

For instance, there's always a point in
these shows where you can tell if the
guy is going to score with his woman
or not.

This usually happens over dinner where
they're actually forced to interact with
each other as opposed to going out and
doing stupid "fun" activities the producers
of the shows set them up on.

This is where the man and the woman actually
get to know one another and find out if
they're "compatible."

But the thing is, if you watch these shows
closely... there's a pattern as to which
guys get the girl and which guys don't!

And typically, this pattern has to do
with one thing:

THE GUY'S ABILITY TO FLIRT.

And when I say "the guy's ability to flirt,"
I'm talking about the guy's ability to
introduce a SEXUAL energy into his
interaction with the woman.

If a guy doesn't know how to flirt with a
woman, he's going to fail to arouse any
type of "spark" or "chemistry" between
the two, and she's not going to be
interested.

This can either be from a complete LACK
of sexual energy, or too much sexual
energy.

If a guy is too afraid to introduce the
sexual element into his interactions with
women, they're not going to look at him
in a sexual manner.

They may enjoy his company, they may even
like him a good deal, but they won't be
able to turn that into a "romantic"
feeling.

On the flip side, if a guy goes too far
and pours on the sexual element, this is
going to turn a girl off, because there's no
mystery or challenge.

If you take the game out of the "game playing,"
you don't have a chance to win.

Remember, though women enjoy sexuality, if
you focus too strongly on it, they're going
to feel as though you only want to use them
for sex, and they won't want to be with you
if that's the case (though there are exceptions
to that rule, but for the most part, that's
how it works).

So the trick is to introduce the sexual
element into your interactions with the
woman, but keep it subtle and slowly
escalate it!

Back to these dating shows, if you watch
the dinner scenes, you will always see
that the guy who starts to talk about sex
and flirt with the girl in a non-overt
way, he will usually be making out
with her by the end of the date!

This is because flirting communicates to
the woman you're with that you're
interested in getting sexual with her,
and you're giving her the opportunity
to do the same with you.

So the real trick when it comes to flirting
is communicating your sexuality in a
non-threatening and fun way.

To flirt with a woman, you need to display
two things:

1. Male sexuality
2. Confidence

Remember: Women are empathetic and emotional.
They respond to strong emotion and feelings.

This means if you effectively send out your
male sexuality and confidence when flirting,
women WILL respond to it!

When it comes to communicating these traits,
the non-verbal element is always more
important than the verbal aspect.

Too many guys think that just by chatting up
a girl, they will be able to successfully
get her attracted.

WRONG!

Actions speak louder than words.

Women will pick up on what you do way more
than what you say. Your body language,
voice tonality, and gestures will
communicate all you need without
you actually having to say anything.

For instance, let's say you see a beautiful
woman and you walk up to her and say
"Hello."

Now, depending on how you walk up to her,
and how you say hello, you can communicate
anything from "You are the sexiest woman
alive and I want to make mad, passionate
love to you," to "I'm just being polite
and I'm not interested in you at
all."

When you communicate your male sexuality,
you must show that you're interested in a
romantic interaction with a woman.

Making jokes about sex, talking about sex,
winking at her, teasing her... these
are all ways you can communicate your
sexuality.

When it comes to the confidence aspect,
it comes down to you not being afraid to
communicate your sexuality to her, and
not making apologies for it.

Often times, a guy will make a forward
comment to a woman, and then retreat
with a "I'm just kidding," or "I didn't
mean that," type comment.

This is the wrong thing to do.

If you look at a woman and playfully say
something like "I know you WANT me," and
she looks at you funny, stick to your guns.

Don't retreat. Take it further. Tell her
"You're trying to seduce me. You're trying
to get in my pants!" Just keep it light
and playful, and she'll come around.

And if she doesn't, it might be time to
find a new woman to flirt with.

Flirting can be quite powerful because
it not only communicates your interest
in the woman you're with, but HER
interest in YOU.

If you flirt with a woman and she flirts
back by playing along -- guess what?

IT'S GAME ON!

If she doesn't reciprocate, chances are
she's not interested and you're wasting
your time.

Use your skills at reading body language
and flirting to gauge where you're woman
is at and how far you need to take it.

In my course, The Art Of Approaching, I go
into great detail on the art of flirting and
reading body language.

By the time you finish that section of the
book, you'll be a MASTER at flirting with
women, and you'll take 90% of the guess-work
out of dating.

If you haven't downloaded my book yet, do
so here:

Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here!

But if you really want to know all the dirty

little secrets for meeting, dating, and attracting

women, then you need to learn my advanced

techniques here:

Check Out Advanced Tactics Here!

Flirting is such an important skill that most
men don't know how to do, just by learning it
you will see your success rate skyrocket!

Don't waste any time and apply what I've given
you here and in my book as soon as you can.

Don't Argue or Debate

2009-06-14T11:30:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen someone win an argument? I think we've all seen

or been a part of arguments where one person states their views more
effectively or convincingly.

But that doesn't necessitate a "win." To me, you only "win" an
argument if you can change the other person's point of view. It's
pretty rare for one person to say to the other- "you know, you're
right. I was wrong but you've shown me the error of my ways.
Thank you"

Now throw in the added emotions that a break up bring to an argument
- rejection, anger, sadness, jealousy, defensiveness, just to name a
few. It's darn near impossible to win an argument after a breakup.

Arguments simply cannot be won with resistance (and really, after a
breakup aren't they always met with resistance?), All that truly
happens is the other person ends up feeling more resolved in their
position than ever before.

Let's look at both sides of a typical argument.

From your side: Your logical side suggests that you can change your
ex's mind by presenting the facts as you see them. Once your ex
hears your case they will be left with no choice but to return to
you because not doing so would be foolish.

From their side: All they're hearing is "words, words, words"
because what they're really hearing is that they are being second
guessed and criticized. It doesn't matter how delicately you try to
state your case. By the simple fact you are questioning their
decision at all, you are disagreeing with them. Their natural
reaction is defensiveness and resistance!

It's a no win situation. I look back at my own love life and those
times when I did try to argue my side and make the other person
change their mind. I think deep down, I knew I had no shot at
changing their mind. So why did I argue and criticize? I think for
my own benefit, of letting out my anger or frustration. But that
doesn't work either. No one ever walks away from an argument
feeling relieved. Instead, they always end up more frustrated than
they were before the argument.

So really, if you choose to argue with your ex, you lose twice. You
don't get the relief or satisfaction that you think may come from
airing out your side of the situation. And you don't bring your ex
any closer to you - in fact, you push them away.

Arguing is a natural human reaction and I for that reason I don't
blame people who argue with their love after a tough breakup.
However, you must know that arguing effectively ruins any chance you
may have at getting back together.

Be the bigger person. Walk away for now. You'll re-enter the
picture soon enough and in a much more positive light. One that
will attract your ex back to you and lead you both towards a stronger
and closer mutual love.

If your best efforts at getting back together, aren't working.
Consider a new approach. Try the ideas and techniques in the
Win Back Love ( HERE )
instead.

To learn more about the Win Back Love philosophies, visit:
HERE and stay tuned for the next installment
of BIGGEST BREAKUP MISTAKES; there are 7 more on the way!

Learning and correcting the biggest breakup mistakes is the first step to getting
back together with your true love.

There are a few more steps involved to win back your true love. I've outlined these
steps and created a potent 6 step blueprint to get back together with your beloved
called Win Back Love - HERE .

If you want to get back together with your lover and enjoy a stronger and
healthier relationship than ever before, check out Win Back Love now -
HERE .

Why Do We Marry?

2009-06-14T11:04:00.000-07:00

First of all, let's take a look at what commitments held marriage together in the past. Historically, marriage has been seen as necessary protection for child-rearing families. In other words, you got married to have kids, because getting married ensures that you'll stay together to form a healthy, stable home for the baby.

Today, Americans don't think that way. Seventy percent of Americans believe that the purpose of marriage is something other than raising kids. We're having fewer children as well. Today, only one third of American households include children under the age of 18, compared to about half of all households in the 1960s.
When a couple does have children together, the presence of children does not have the same kind of deterrent effect on divorce as it did forty years ago. A 1994 study found that only 15% of the population agreed that parents of children should stay together for the sake of the children, even if the parents no longer get along.

In the past, another reason to stay married was because of economic dependence. Marriage used to provide a form of economic security. If one partner's earning ability was threatened, there was always the other partner's income to fall back on. Today, young people do not believe that a marriage provides any form of economic security. They prefer to make it on their own financially--men and women both--before considering themselves ready for marriage. As a result, financial interdependence is not a strong enough reason to
hold married couples together.

Historically, religious beliefs also fortified marital vows. Yet today fewer and fewer couples share a religious view of marriage as a covenant between a man and a woman before God. In fact, according to the National Marriage Project, only 42% of young people consider it important to marry someone with the same religion. As a result, for many couples their wedding vows don't have the same force of commitment.

Currently, there is less social disapproval of divorce or extended periods of singledom than ever. Men and women are single longer and don't feel the need to marry due to the availability of alternative lifestyles, such as co-habitation. In fact, the median age of marriage for American women is 25; for men, it's 27). Many
young people consider their first marriage a trial marriage anyway; they assume that it will end in divorce but marry anyway to have the experience. There's little social censure in being a divorcé, and the number of divorced individuals in the single scene means that a recently divorced person has a fairly good chance of
remarrying.

What forms the basis of a man and a woman's commitment to their marriage, then, if it is not their children, economic stability, God, or social mores?

According to a 2001 study by National Marriage Project, the primary reason that young men and women want to marry is to find a soul mate: someone with whom they have a profound spiritual and emotional connection for life.

If you got married because you expected your partner to be your soul mate for life, you reflect a trend in modern society towards couple-oriented marriages, where the primary focus of the marriage is the relationship between the two people involved rather than social, religious, or financial considerations. Unfortunately, this couple-oriented focus can create huge expectations and pressures. Couples have a much lower tolerance for unhappiness than in the past. In fact, they are abandoning marriage at much lower thresholds of dissatisfaction. According to the National Marriage Project, it is estimated that over 50% of divorces now occur not because of dramatic conflicts and fights, but because of more generic, less traceable feelings of dissatisfaction, distress, and unhappiness.

Sadly, marriages that have an underlying feeling of discontentment can and often do get better over time. If couples can stick out the hard times, they find that the good times that follow are worth what came before. It's an important point that many lose sight of: happy marriages are not always happy. They have periods of
unhappiness and conflict followed by periods of reconciliation and reconnection. The trick is to stay committed to the marriage during those unhappy times and find ways of navigating through them.

Challenges to Commitment

Modern couples have a whirlwind of duties to juggle: they may work full-time, have children to raise, and have social commitments to community service organizations, committees, or clubs. By the time you throw in commitments to family, social engagements with friends, personal hobbies, gym time, and the rest, the modern couple has very little time for one another.

Obviously, your level of commitment must be divided among a number of things, but what level of commitment should you give to each? Try drawing a pie chart with each section labeled according to the amount of time you dedicate to it. Ask your spouse to do the same. Afterwards, discuss whether the balance of commitments is healthy for you both.

Here are some commitments that often test a couple's dedication to one another:

- Workaholism. This occurs when overtime, job commitments, travel, and pressure make the work relationship (rather than the marital relationship) the primary identity-giving relationship in a person's life, giving them their chief sense of satisfaction and purpose. If you would rather be at work than at home, or spend your leisure time with your workmates rather than your spouse, your marriage is on rocky terrain. Many workaholics can't see what they're doing. They claim that their hard work is helping keep the marriage together by providing an income. Both partners must make some difficult lifestyle changes if they are to resolve this issue.

- Children. As much joy and pleasure children can bring to a marriage, they also test the marital bonds by creating stressful situations. Children can pit parent against parent. Their behavior can cause a tense family environment that neither partner wants to come home to. They can demand enormous amounts of energy
and leave none for anyone else. The child-rearing years can also be dangerous for couples because
the focus of the marital unit switches from the pleasure of being a couple to raising the children. Make time for being a couple. Even if your children begrudge it at first, the happy family environment will more than make up for it.

- Other people, usually a needy friend, parent, or family member, who requires large amounts of one partner's time. This often occurs when parents of one or both spouses are getting older and in need of extra assistance. Spouses should not let anyone get between them. If your spouse resents the amount of time you spend with a needy parent or friend, you need to have a discussion and come to some sort of resolution about what amount of time would be appropriate.

- Any crisis where one partner is completely responsible for the resolution of the problem, with no input or assistance from the other partner. If a married couple distinguishes between "your" problem and "my" problem, they eliminate the crucial sense of teamwork that keeps a marriage together. If you are facing a
crisis--even if it's yours alone--you must involve your spouse. A marriage isn't about going at it alone.

- Addictions. In this "soft" sense of addiction, an addiction occurs when a person spends all their time at one thing and uses it to avoid facing real-world commitments and duties. For example, your spouse may spend all of his or her spare time at the bar, on the computer, or in the garage tinkering. These activities are not a problem until they become an escape mechanism to avoid spending time with you or engaging in conversation. One common problem occurs when one spouse surfs the internet until late at night. When they go to bed, their spouse is already asleep, which increases the alienation between the two parties. Hobbies are wonderful in moderation, but they should never become your primary source of pleasure. Find activities that you can do with your spouse.

Pick-Up Report

2009-06-14T10:56:00.001-07:00

Picking up women can be easy and fun for you.

...if you use the right methods.

Most guys use lame tactics that quickly get
them rejected OR ignored. But you can easily
approach any woman you want and get her
number if you want to.

But how?

It's rather simple actually, using advanced language
techniques (I even GIVE you the exact scripts I personally
use every day), you can 'steer' conversations and
literally have ANY GIRL eating out of the palm of your
hand.

See how it's done, here:

Check Out My Secrets To Meeting Women Here!

Once you've 'steered' a conversation into any
direction you want, you then can slowly introduce
your interest in her by subtlety starting to flirt.

It's astonishingly effective (AND easy).

Grab a seat, because I'm about to dispel
some VERY COMMON myths that most of the
'old school' dating methods have you believe.

I have a lot of guys email me saying:

'Joseph, it's impossible to do THIS... and THAT'.

Let me tell you this, Readers:

It is only impossible if you believe it is.

I have meet some amazing women using lines people
told me would "never work."

I have gone out on dates with girls who most people
thought were "out of my league."

I have (many times) gotten a girl into bed with
me who wasn't really that interested in me at
first.

Let me tell you something about these people who
say these things are impossible...

They have been BRAINWASHED by the "status quo" that
the media and feminists have forced-fed us for years.

They believe that men have to be pathetic losers who
beg for a woman's affection, or they have to be
over-bearing JERKS who just use women.

But the people who believe this stuff are completely
missing the point!

Their is a New School of meeting, dating, and seducing
women thathas been brewing for years beneath your feet,
just waiting for the right time to peep it's head into
our culture.

...GUESS WHAT: THE TIME IS NOW!

And the only place to get this information is
right here:

Find Out How To Meet Any Woman Here!

Using my proven dating tactics, you can
accomplish things that people will constantly
tell you is IMPOSSIBLE.

It's funny, but you will learn just to stay quiet and
laugh under your breath when other people
tell you this is impossible.

Especially when you walk up to an amazingly attractive
woman and get her number while they look on in amazement!

See exactly how it's done, here:

Check Out My Approach Women Secrets Now!

Their are now more than 288,000 people on my email list,
begging for this information.

That's the size of a small city. That many people
literally ask for this information and receive it
EVERY DAY.

Honestly, this has become MUCH bigger than
I ever anticipated ...or wanted!

I have a lot of threats from people about this
site. Obviously some people don't want
this knowledge public... but I personally feel
this is to powerful to keep to myself.

Let me know what you think:

Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here!

Openers for All "Situations"

2009-06-13T11:54:00.000-07:00

I want to share a story with you all that I
thought was interesting.

Friday night, I was out with a friend of mine
clubbing. As we were walking from one club to
another, we saw two women walking together
in front of us.

These women were HOT!

So hot, in fact, that every guy they passed by
on the sidewalk tried to talk to them. How did
they try this? By saying things like:

"Hey, where you going?"

"Damn, you fine!"

"Hey, come back here, baby!"

Needless to say, these girls were completely
IGNORING each and every guy who talked to
them.

It's a harsh reality that most girls who are
as hot as these two were get approached by men
ALL THE TIME, and have heard every stupid line
in the book.

In fact, they get approached so much, that they
don't even respond anymore. They're just focused
on getting to where they're going.

So of course, upon seeing this, I thought to
myself "How would I approach these girls?"

The answer was pretty self-evident. In fact,
it was staring me right in the face!

The situation was dictating what I should
say to them.

"Oh my god! Every single guy is trying to
pick you guys up! How annoying is that?
You guys need to hire BODYGUARDS just to
keep all these horny waldos at bay!"

This is an example of a SITUATIONAL OPENER.

Situational Openers can be the best way to
meet a woman if they are done right. This
is because this type of Opener is UNIQUE to
the interaction you are having with the woman.

Not only that, but it shows you guys have a
common understanding of the reality you are
mutually experiencing.

And that, my friends, creates a connection
between the two of you.

It's like knowing the punchline to a joke
most others have no clue about.

And more importantly, this is one of my
most favorite kind of situational opener,
namely, the "Crash and Burn" opener.

This is a situational opener where you
capitalize on other men's failures, while
conveying the illusion that you are different
from the other guys and are not looking to
get into the woman's pants (even though the
truth may be VASTLY different from that which
you are conveying).

For example, anytime you are in a situation
where there are women you want to approach,
and you see a guy go up to them and try to
hit on them, this gives you the chance to
use the "Crash and Burn" opener.

Simply walk up to the girl, and comment on
what the other guy did wrong.

Saying things like:

"So, how'd he do?"

or

"Did it hurt? He was hitting on you
pretty hard. Did it hurt?"

Or anything along those lines will open
up your target for conversation.

These types of "Crash and Burn" openers
work great in high stimulus environments
where girls are being hit on (like
bars and clubs, for example).

So next time you see some poor schmoe
strike out, be sure to take the
opportunity to capitalize on it!

You can find out more about the "Crash and Burn"
Opener, along with other Situational Openers in
my ebook, "The Art of Approaching: How to meet
ANY Woman, ANY Time, ANY Where you may be."

You can download the ebook right now at:

HERE

And of course, if you are serious about wanting

immediate and incredible success with women,

then you simply must check out my advanced

tactics here:

HERE

The fatal mistake that INSTANTLY turns your woman off

2009-06-13T11:37:00.000-07:00

There are many things guys do wrong when their girls

break up with them, but there is ONE MISTAKE that's
so common and so DAMAGING that I had to single it out
just to make sure that:

a) You're not "guilty" of making it
b) How to avoid it if you're on the brink of making it
c) How to correct it if you already ARE making it

This mistake is none other than showing your girl
that you're desperate for her. It's doing things
such as:

* Repeatedly telling her you love her
* Calling her non-stop to check up on her
* Asking (or begging) her to give you another chance
* Telling her that she's "the one" and that you
can't live without her
* Letting her know that you love her and will always
be there for her

Every one of those things sends a clear message to
your girl: that you are a desperate guy in dire need
to be with her. The consequences?

a) It pushes her further away
b) It reassures her that she made the right decision
to end this

As I told you in the last email I sent you, your girl
wants to be with the guy she met, not the guy that you've
become. And there's nothing that women hate more than a
needy guy - the exact opposite of what you were when
you started dating her.

What you need to understand is that there's a small
window of opportunity for you to get her back. But
if you manage to rack up enough "negative points"
that window will soon slam shut, crushing any chances
of being together again.

Now I realize that it's hard (or near impossible)
to avoid this mistake and that's why 99% of guys
are guilty of making it. And you know what? It's
perfectly natural because it's a logical reaction
to rejection.

However, if you TRULY want her back you need to start
making some drastic changes. And you start by avoiding
mistakes that make things worse.

And the best way to avoid the most crucial mistake
and make sure you don't become desperate is to re-read,
understand, and internalize the solution to Common
Mistake #1 on page 5 of the report I sent you. I can't
stress enough how important this is and how much weight
it bears on your overall situation.

And if you've already made this mistake, then putting
an end to it right now goes a long way in correcting it.

Getting Touchy Feely with Your Partner

2009-06-13T11:23:00.001-07:00

According to Howard Markman, Ph.D., professor of psychology and head of the Center for Marital and Family Studies at the University of Denver, "The quality of the couple's communication before marriage is one of the best predictors of future marital success." It's not the differences in opinions and preferences that matter;
what matters is how those differences are dealt with and resolved.

This requires strong communication skills, skills that few couples develop before it's too late. Once a marriage has broken down, neither partner feels inclined to communicate or open up to the other person. Markman's solution is to teach constructive arguing techniques before a couple marries, but that doesn't help the millions of couples out there with advanced marital problems.

Are You a Good Communicator?

If, as Markman claims, 30% to 50% of couples are mutually abusive, or respond to verbal or emotional abuse with like abuse, then it's little wonder that so many marriages are dysfunctional. Do you have any negative communication patterns or attitudes? Check any that fit you from the list below.

- I act defensively when my spouse brings up any criticism of me or our marriage.
- I always have to be right,
- I always talk about the negative side of things; it's more realistic.
- I avoid conflict by turning off emotionally.
- I blame my spouse if it is his or her fault.
- I bring up the past in arguments.
- I criticize my spouse in front of others.
- I don't ask for what I want directly. If my spouse loved me, he or she would read my mind.
- I don't believe that I have to do everything I promise to do.
- I don't have to be respectful to my spouse. We're married, so we can treat each other as we like.
- I don't share everything with my spouse and keep my feelings to myself.
- I don't tell my spouse everything. Secrets are okay.
- I find it difficult to say, "I'm sorry."
- I find it hard to wait to speak until my spouse has finished talking.
- I let conflicts last for days or sometimes months.
- I mock or ridicule my spouse.
- I never forget anything my spouse has done to me.
- I often find myself raising my voice when I disagree with my spouse.
- I often talk over my spouse.
- I resent my spouse for comments that he or she has made in the past.
- I tease my spouse in ways that my spouse finds upsetting.
- I want to win every argument, not reach a solution.
- I'm afraid that sharing my most personal thoughts with my spouse will allow him or her to abuse them (such as by ridiculing me or by sharing them with others).
- If my spouse misinterprets what I said, I get angry.
- If something that my spouse does bothers me, we have an
argument about it.
- My attention often wanders when my spouse is talking to me.
- My spouse is too sensitive to what I say.
- When I don't feel like talking about something, I end up getting angry.
- When my spouse doesn't know anything about a topic, I let him or her know it.
- When we have an argument, I often end up yelling, crying, or storming out of the house.

It is hard to create an environment of positive, loving communication when you've never experienced that kind of environment yourself. People who grew up in dysfunctional families with negative communication patterns often find themselves falling into those same behaviors themselves when they get married. Nevertheless, bad communication can destroy a marriage. If you can...

- Replace criticism with praise,
- Replace accusations with attempts at understanding,
- Replace talking with listening,
- Replace defensiveness with openness, and
- Replace silence with sharing,

...you'll be amazed at the difference it makes in your marriage.

Getting Your Spouse to Open Up Again

Often, both partners in a marriage want to be perceived as "tough." They don't want to give in first. They want to show their partner that they don't need him or her. As a result, the communication gap grows wider. Neither person will confess what it is that is worrying them. Mistrust fills the gaps created by silence. Soon, differences feel irreconcilable.

They aren't. If you want to get your spouse to open up and break the silence barrier, there are a few things you need to do.

Often, the reason that your spouse isn't talking is because he or she doesn't want to create conflict by confessing their feelings. We all have negative feelings about our spouse or our relationships from time to time. In many marriages, partners zip their lip and say nothing, repressing their feelings until resentment seeps through. In other marriages, partners react angrily towards their spouse and express their feelings through criticism and verbal abuse. Neither option makes for a healthy marriage.

Even if your spouse isn't saying anything to you, chances are that he or she has a lot to say. It's just that your spouse doesn't know how to bring it up, is afraid of your reaction, or doesn't think it is worth the effort to share with you.

You can get your spouse to open up to you again by creating an environment in which he or she feels comfortable talking. Tactics not to try include:

- Demanding that your spouse tell you what's wrong or why they won't talk.
- Accusing your partner of giving you the silent treatment.
- Getting angry at them for not contributing their part to the conversation.
- Feeling resentful that they're making life difficult for you.

Instead, what you need to do is:

1. Practice your own listening skills. Instead of filling in the silences with chatter, allow those silences to remain. Often, one spouse compensates for another's lack of speech by talking too much. Your partner may feel that you never give him or her a chance to speak because you're always talking.

2. Cultivate an attitude of non-judgmental acceptance. This means that you unconditionally love and accept your partner, no matter what he or she says. If you often respond defensively or critically when your partner shares his or her thoughts and feelings, you are actually punishing your partner for opening up to you. If your partner tries to open up, acknowledge his or her comments to show that you are listening, but refrain from adding your own opinion until you've heard everything that he or she has to say. Sometimes, we just need to be heard, and it feels better knowing that our partner has listened to us all the way through without criticizing or condemning us.

3. Learn how to apologize and mean it. One apology, meant sincerely, goes a long way. When your partner shares a concern or problem that he or she is having with your marriage, don't resort to an angry retort. Listen carefully, without criticism or a knee-jerk self-defense. If you are too upset to think clearly, tell your partner that you appreciate hearing about his or her concern, but that you need time to think it over. If you come tothe conclusion that what your partner has told you has some truth in it, apologize clearly and directly.
Instead of muttering, "I'm sorry," look at your partner in the eyes and tell him or her, "I am sorry for X. I am sorry for having made you feel like you did." By telling him or her in your own words what you're sorry for - in other words, what you did or said that made your partner feel hurt - you show your partner that you really do understand.

4. Making opening up to one another a positive experience. It may sound wishy-washy or fuzzy, but verbally thanking one another for sharing thoughts and feelings is valuable positive reinforcement. A hug after a difficult conversation can make all the difference. It doesn't matter if you agree or disagree with your partner; what matters is that you show your partner that you really do care about his or her feelings and opinions.
Every time your partner shares something, no matter how little, express your gratitude. Tell your partner, "I'm glad I know that you like that/feel that way/believe that. I like knowing more about you. It makes me feel closer to you."

How to Argue

Most couples are exceedingly poor at resolving conflicts. In my book, Save My Marriage Today!, I give you a number of techniques designed to teach you healthier conflict resolution. Today, I'll just outline the most basic ground-rules for arguments. Discuss these with your spouse and agree on them together.

1. Abuse and physical violence will not be tolerated. If things get too hot, take a break or take a walk.
2. Avoid assigning blame. Instead, talk about how your partner's actions made you feel.
3. Be honest. Don't argue about one thing if something else is bothering you.
4. Don't take things personally. When someone is upset, they can say or do things that make it worse.
5. Focus on resolving the issue--not winning the argument. Think negotiation, not competition.
6. If your spouse hasn't understood your motives or misunderstood what you said, don't get angry. Explain yourself.
7. No bringing up hurtful events from the past. Stay in the present.
8. No going to sleep on an argument.
9. No name-calling.
10. Once an argument is resolved, forgive and forget.

The Silent Poison: Resentment

When hurt piles upon hurt, it is easy to feel as you and your spouse are in a competition where the more you can hurt the other person, the more points you get. This is a dangerous and deadly way to think of conflicts. As your marriage continues to crumble, you'll begin to feel more comfortable thinking about your spouse in
terms of resentment, blame, and disappointment rather than in terms of love, forgiveness, and teamwork.

Every negative feeling that you have about your spouse builds and builds, even if you don't act out on those feelings. Unless you do something about those negative feelings, you will find yourself becoming more and more resentful of your spouse and his or her ability to make your life unpleasant.

There are several things you can do. I suggest consciously counteracting every negative feeling with positive acts of love, affection, and respect. You should also learn how to talk to your partner about your feelings in a neutral, non-accusatory, calm way. This is extraordinarily difficult and will take a long time to master. Negative feelings expressed in anger or as a knee-jerk reaction grow and become worse. If you can learn to express your negative feelings neutrally with the express purpose of finding some way to resolve them, you may find that they dissipate with the mere act of sharing them.

Here is Biggest Breakup Mistakes, Part 2

2009-06-12T11:44:00.001-07:00

BREAKUP MISTAKE #2: Begging and Bargaining

This is perhaps the most common mistake, perhaps because it feels
like it should work. But that's where it gets tricky. It only
feels like it should work to the person doing the begging or
bargaining, but unfortunately, the other person almost never feels
the same.

The subconscious theory behind begging and bargaining actually isn't
that crazy. Usually the "begger" is thinking along the lines of;
"I want to be with this person SO BAD - if I can just SHOW them how
badly I want to get back together they will take me back."

The problem is, begging is not an attractor, it's a turn-off, and the
natural reaction to it is resistance. So the begger thinks
they are helping the situation, but in reality they are actually making
it worse.

Another way people beg is by using guilt. "After all I've done for
you, including X, Y, and Z, and now YOU want to break up with ME"?
Let me tell you something - guilt doesn't work either. And really,
would you want it too? Do you want your lover to be with you
because they feel guilty or because they love you?

Bargaining is simply saying "if you get back together with me,
I'll change." Even though they may come with the best of
intentions, bargaining doesn't work for four main reasons.

1. The other person simply doesn't believe it.
2. They DO believe it, but they really aren't interested in
trying to change you.
3. The other believes you but they think they shouldn't have to
break up to bring about this change. They feel you should've
wanted to do whatever this change is about all along.
4. Bargaining is like begging in that the natural human reaction
to it is resistance.

And again, do you want to be with someone because they feel guilty
or because you said you would change?

You're better than this. You deserve to be with someone who wants
to be with you simply because they love you.

Don't make things worse. Avoid this very common mistake.

Stay tuned for the next installment of BIGGEST BREAKUP MISTAKES;
there are 8 more on the way!

Stopping the mistakes is the first step in getting your true love to
return to you.

But that's only the beginning. There are a lot of things you can
do to get your lover back.

Follow a potent blueprint to get quickly back together with your beloved.
Check out Win Back Now - HERE .

Find out what simple steps you can take to easily win back the
love of your life, and enjoy a fulfilling and harmonious
relationship with your soul mate.

Affairs: How to Spot Them and Prevent Them Before They Occur

2009-06-12T11:31:00.001-07:00

All of us are capable of having affairs. To be incapable of having an affair is to be incapable of feeling temptation. Feeling the temptation to have an affair isn't the same thing as having it, however. Many happily married couples admit that they are attracted to members of the opposite sex from time to time. Yet instead of repressing or nursing those feelings, they acknowledge them as the sign of a healthy sex drive and let them go.

When a person is unable to let go of that feeling of attraction towards someone not their spouse, they may risk everything--even their marriage--to give into their feelings. Sadly, affairs are the number one cause of divorce. In January 2005, the BBC published a survey of matrimonial lawyers in which affairs came out as the
number one cause of divorce in the U.K., accounting for 27% of divorces in 2004. Family strains were the second highest cause at 18%, physical or emotional abuse the third highest at 17%, and mid-life crises were fourth highest at 13%.

When marriages end in divorce as a result of infidelity, men are three times more likely to be the adulterous partner. However, women cheat on their spouses as well. A 2002 survey by the National Opinion Research Center at Chicago University found that 15% of women surveyed had had an extramarital affair. This number
had risen five percent from their previous survey ten years earlier, and experts expect that the number will continue to climb until women have just as many affairs as men. The number of men who'd had an affair remained steady at 22%.

If roughly one in five men and one in six women have an affair at some time in their life, could your spouse be one of them?

The numbers climb even higher if emotional affairs are included. An emotional affair can be even more threatening to a relationship than a physical affair, because the lover replaces the spouse as the primary source of emotional well-being and companionship. Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth: A Personal Handbook for Recovering From Affairs, estimates that the chances of a woman having either a physical or emotional affair at some time in her marriage are 50% or more.

What Triggers an Affair

The roots of affairs are difficult to pin down and are usually many, not one. Even if you are in a happy, stable marriage, you or your partner could find yourself tempted to have an affair simply for the excitement, novelty, and break from routine.

A variety of motives, both internal and social, spur people to have affairs. The most fertile ground for affairs occurs when there is a potential lover who is available and willing, when conditions make the practical side of giving into the temptation easy, and there is little to no expectation of a powerful social or moral condemnation for having the affair.

Here are some of the most common social and marital conditions that pave the way for affairs.

- Increased social contact with members of the opposite sex, especially in the workplace.

Temptation is everywhere, but as men and women spend more time with each other away from their partners, giving into that temptation becomes easier and easier. When a man or a woman spends a lot of time with a member of the opposite sex--whether friend, co-worker, or teammate--they develop a platonic friendship that can become much, much more. Familiarity, emotional intimacy, and common professional or sporting goals create a powerful bond that may feel more compelling than the marital relationship. Computers and cell
phones make keeping in touch with a lover simple.

Can men and women ever "just be friends"? In 1989 movie When Harry Met Sally, Harry's answer was emphatically no. Harry tells Sally, "...Men and women can't be friends, because the sex part always gets
in the way.... No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her."

If your spouse is defensive or secretive about his or her friendship with a member of the opposite sex, you need to have an open and honest talk about the limits on your relationships with members of the opposite sex. It's not okay for your husband's best friend to be another woman. It's not okay for your wife's number
one confidant to be another man. In a strong marriage, both partners look first to one another to get their emotional needs met. This brings us to the next point...

- Not meeting one another's emotional needs.

This is this single greatest cause of affairs. When relationships are struggling, both men and women look elsewhere to get their emotional needs met and easily find themselves in the arms of someone "who appreciates them."

If you and your partner take each other for granted and treat one another like housemates instead of lovers, the stage is set for one of you to have an affair. Women, feeling unappreciated by their husbands, find solace with someone who does listen to them. Unfortunately, an emotional affair can be just as devastating to a
marriage as a physical affair. Men, feeling as if they're always being criticized and cannot please their wives if they try, enjoy the emotional reinforcement of someone who thinks that they're wonderful and can do no wrong.

Affairs often occur when one or both partners are under stress. Maybe you've just taken a new job; maybe your partner is struggling with the demands of a new child or ailing parent. If one of you cannot meet your partner's emotional needs for any length of time, your partner's chances of having an affair skyrocket.

Avoid this situation through open, honest communication. Notice when your partner is feeling down and don't rest until you've understood the source of your partner's emotions. If you feel that your partner isn't there for you when you need him or her, talk about it. Open the conversation with a description of the things that your partner does for you that you appreciate, then explain what your emotional needs are and exactly what your partner can do to meet them. Next, turn the tables and ask your partner to share the same with you. Unless you know what your partner's emotional needs are, you cannot hope to fulfill them by guesswork.

- Commuter jobs, or where one partner is away for long periods of time.

We all know the stories of musicians, actors, or athletes who spend long months on tour and return home to a wrecked marriage. Cheating is easy when partners spend long periods of time away from one another. Even if your partner calls you every night, you have no idea what they're doing in the time away from you. It is easy
for your partner to disassociate what they do in their time on their own from what they do with you. They may feel as if they live in two separate worlds that need never meet.

If you and your spouse spend long periods of time away from one another, you need to develop a plan of action to maintain your bond and sense of intimacy even during those times when you're away.
Increase your accountability to one another. Your partner should have a cell phone that you can call anytime, and you should always know where your partner is staying. The best solution in cases like these is to minimize the amount of time you're away from one another, even if it requires changing jobs or relocating.

- Overly scheduled lives with little leisure time spent together.

When partners don't have time to relax together, their marriage becomes all work and no play. If both of you have overly scheduled lives, crammed to the full with taking your kids to school and after-school activities, meetings, overtime, fixing up your house, and social engagements on the weekends, your marriage will
suffocate from lack of attention. Just because you live together and wear a ring doesn't mean that your marriage is invulnerable. A marriage thrives when there is space for both partners to spend quality, unstructured time together, doing nothing but enjoying one another's company.

If your partner always spends his or her leisure time with others (at the bar, with a hobby that excludes you, with members of a social or sporting club) rather than you, the stage is set for infidelity. Your partner should have the time and space to do activities that he or she personally enjoys, but at least half (preferably more) of your partner's leisure time should be spent with you.

- Increased public acceptance of affairs.

Public acceptance of affairs has transformed dramatically over the past few decades. There continues to be strong social and moral condemnation of infidelity, but the consequences of having an affair are not as great as in the past. Nowadays, an affair isn't shadowed by the threat of pregnancy, the brand of social stigma, or
losing one's job as a result. Cheating spouses are comforted by the ease of divorce that would allow them to leave their spouse for their lover. As culture removes more and more of the consequences of infidelity, more spouses will cheat. It's as simple as that.

- Increased importance placed culturally on having a great body and superb sex life.

Men and women both have high expectations of marriage--that their partner will be their soul mate, that love will be effortless, that their sex life will be dynamic and exciting. When these expectations are not fulfilled, men and women often look to someone else for fulfillment rather than examining their own expectations.

More and more women are having Desperate Housewives-style affairs with hunky young men, risking marriages with men who socially would be considered real catches: impressive jobs, wealthy, mature and
responsible. Why would these women risk the security and comfort of their marriages for 20-somethings with great bodies but not much else?

Modern Western culture places a high premium on an exciting, fulfilling sex life. When everyone else is doing it--in the movies, on the billboards, and in the media--we think we need to be doing it, too. Yet a poll by Self magazine discovered that 58% of women polled were disinterested in sex, of which nearly a fifth were
completely dissatisfied, preferring to watch television. Why were these women unhappy with their sex lives? Was it their partner, their attitude, or their expectations?

Although research proves that married men and women have better (e.g., more fulfilling and more frequent) sex lives than singles or couples living together, popular opinion believes the opposite. Many people believe that once you marry, sex becomes dull and boring. What better to liven it up than the allure of an illicit rendezvous?

In fact, sex can actually improve in a marriage as a result of affair. The cheating partner feels guilty and doesn't want the spouse to suspect anything, so he or she puts more effort into their sex life. Cheating can also increase a cheating spouse's sex drive, because when you're having more sex, you want more sex.

Unfortunately, many couples don't put the effort into their sex life until it's too late. If you and your partner are distant, kiss infrequently, and seem to have lost any sense of intimacy, one of you may seek physical comfort elsewhere. Decrease the chances of this happening by making an effort to be physically intimate with your spouse on a regular basis. Kiss and cuddle often. Touch one another randomly, whether by touching your partner's waist or arm. Invest in your appearance and don't use your marriage as an excuse to let yourself go. Keep yourself fit. Avoid wearing worn-out, ill-fitting, or unattractive clothing around the house--and especially to bed. Liven up your sex life by regularly trying new things; if you can't think of any, purchase an erotic
book or visit an adult shop. The investment you put into physical intimacy will pay off by making the hours you do spend together--sleeping side by side--into ones to cherish.

Where Affairs Happen

You should already be able to guess the number one place for affairs to begin: the workplace. The vast majority of affairs start in the workplace, primarily because many people today spend more time at work than they do at home. When men and women work in close proximity to one another, they can find it easier to relate to one another than to their spouses back home--especially if their home environment is rife with conflict.

Affairs can happen anywhere your partner frequents without your company. This includes mixed-gender clubs or societies, out-of-town conferences, or the gym. Another growing arena for affairs is the internet. Websites advertise personals for persons seeking extramarital affairs. The internet offers the advantages of anonymity, ease of communication, and the ability to meet like-minded individuals. If your spouse spends a lot of time on
the internet with the door closed, you need to have a serious talk. Don't accuse: if your partner is using the internet for research or to communicate with friends, he or she will have nothing to hide. But if your partner is indeed using the internet to conduct an affair or view pornography, he or she will become defensive and tell you that what he or she surfs the net for is none of your business. That's a red light. Keeping the computer in a public area where you or anyone else can see the screen is a wise move.

Will an Affair Destroy Your Marriage?

Many people seek marriage advice only after they've discovered that their partner has been having an affair. In many cases, the cheating spouse has already moved out and is living with their lover. An affair can destroy your marriage, but it doesn't have to.

Positive signs that your marriage can be rebuilt after an affair include:

- Your partner told you about the betrayal on his or her own.
- Your partner is willing to answer questions about the affair.
- Your partner expresses guilt or remorse.
- Your partner is willing to cut off all contact with his or her lover.
- Your partner asks for or agrees to marriage counseling.
- You are willing to let go of your resentment and look inside yourself for reasons that your partner may have sought fulfillment of his or her needs with someone else.
- Both of you are willing to make personal changes to get your marriage back on solid ground.

If your partner is unwilling to talk about the affair, refuses to cut off all contact with his or her lover, and accuses you of causing him or her to have the affair, you will have many challenges to overcome to get your marriage back together again.

What You Should Do if You Suspect an Affair

Take some advice from the experts at How to Catch a Cheating Spouse
(HERE).

"When you suspect your partner is cheating on you, you need to resist your first instinct to confront your partner and accuse them. This may seem like the most logical thing to do, but you have to resist this strong instinct and think carefully and strategically. If you expose your suspicions immediately, what sort of response do you hope to get?

If you don't have any proof, or your proof is just circumstantial, the most likely response you will get is denial. If you can't prove without a doubt that you know about their affair, there is little you will be able to do that will refute their denial. From a strategic point of view, you will have jeopardized your chances of catching your partner in the act because you will have alerted them to your suspicion. In future they will be more careful
to hide their tracks, making it harder for you to find proof. If you claim ignorance, and don't confront your partner, they will have no reason to think you suspect anything. In fact, they may become reckless and become complacent when it comes to hiding evidence of their affair.

From a strategic point of view, acting as though you are ignorant is the best tactic to use. If people don't think you are listening, it is surprising what they may say. They may unconsciously let little things slip....

The longer you are able to maintain the illusion of ignorance the more proof you will be able to gather. Remember, without concrete proof, you should never accuse your partner. Not only is there the likelihood they will deny it and make it harder for you to prove their guilt, but there is also the possibility, however unlikely, of you being wrong."

How To Start Conversations With Women

2009-06-12T11:22:00.001-07:00

Meet Women Mini-Course #3: How To Start Conversations With Women

By now we have covered the two foundations
of being more successful with women -- namely
how to read their body language and how to
improve your self-confidence.

Now that you've got the fundamentals
down, it's time to take the plunge and...

*gulp*

MEET THE WOMEN YOU WANT!

If you're going to meet a woman, you have to
know how to start a conversation with her.

There's just no way around it. You must
engage her in some manner, and the easiest
(and most accepted) way is to talk to her.

But this is where most men choke.

Have you ever been in a situation where
you saw a really beautiful woman that you
wanted to meet, and then suddenly your
brain took a vacation and you simply --

COULD NOT THINK OF A SINGLE THING TO SAY???

And then, before you know it, the moment
has passed, the opportunity is gone, and
the woman you wanted to meet is now gone
forever!

Or worse yet...

You ARE able to think of something to say
to her, but the conversation quickly fizzles
out and the girl moves on, leaving you
feeling like you've blown your chance!

Hey, we've all been there before.

Here's a FACT for you to chew on...

Being able to quickly engage a woman in a
conversation DRAMATICALLY increases your
ability to get them on a date!

See, when you have a conversation with
another person, you're not just simply
TALKING to them.

What you're doing is creating rapport
and comfort with that person, which are
the necessary building blocks of
HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS.

Without rapport and comfort, there is no
way you can get a girl to give you a
serious commitment to see you again.

Period.

End of story.

Do not pass GO, do not collect $200.

Now, I know that there are some guys out
there who would rather take a swift kick
to the teeth than talk to a girl. But
that's because they simply don't know what
to say to a woman to get a conversation
started with them!

In my course, The Art Of Approaching, I take
a great deal of time sharing tons and tons of
tactics on how to quickly and easily meet any
woman you want, and how to get them into
instant conversations to create that
all-important comfort and rapport that will
get you that date you want!

No other book will go as in-depth into the
art of meeting women as mine does.

When you get my course, you'll learn all about the
concept of the "Opener."

The Opener is a line you can use to start a
conversation with a woman that has the ability
to lead into a larger conversation and
more interaction with her.

It's the catalyst of every interaction you'll
have with a girl.

Usually, I recommend you have 3 openers memorized
and ready to go, so that once one runs its
course, you have two more ready to go to
carry on that conversation.

A good Opener can be anything that's relatively
open-ended, and can be transformed into different
conversations.

Here's one you can try out for yourself:

"Hi, this'll only take a second -- I need a female
opinion on something. My little niece (or cousin,
or sister, or daughter) has a birthday coming up,
and she's at that age where she's really into
stuffed animals, and I'm wondering... do you think
a little girl would like a stuffed tiger or a
stuffed unicorn better?"

Now, after saying this, she may ask you questions
about your niece, like how old she is and what
she likes.

Tell her that she's young (like 10-12) and that
she has so many stuffed animals already, but
you know she doesn't have a unicorn or a tiger.

When the woman you're talking to answers, ask
her why she thinks that's the way to go.
So for instance:

HER: Get her the tiger. Totally.
YOU: The tiger? Why do you think the tiger is the way to go?
HER: Tigers are cool! They're like big cuddly cats.

From there, you can talk about any number
of things. Her childhood, what stuffed
animals she liked crowing up, her love of
cats, the toys you used to play with when
you were young, etc.

Just find SOMETHING the woman says to latch
onto and use that to relate to her.

Start talking about that one topic until the
conversation starts to flow. And if one
conversation runs its course, you can stack
another opener to start a new conversation.

For instance, a good follow-up to this opener is:

"So, do you like kids?"

After she answers, ask her why is it she feels
that way. Then talk about your views on kids
(tip: Always agree with her point of
view! At least initially).

Eventually, the conversation will be flowing,
and before you know it, it's time to ask for
her number and set up a date!

Seriously, go out and try the Openers I've
given you for yourself and see what results
you'll get. I guarantee you'll be pleasantly
surprised at the reactions you get.

Of course, maybe these particular openers aren't
for you. In my course, The Art Of Approaching,
I list a TON of openers which have all been tested
on real women out in the real world, and have been
PROVEN to work.

Not only that, but I break down each type of opener
and show you how to create your own so they're more
geared towards your unique personality.

If you haven't downloaded a copy of my course yet,
then you can do so now by clicking below:

Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here!

But if you REALLY want to know all the dirty little

secrets to meeting tons and tons of drop-dead

gorgeous women, you need to check out my

advanced course now:

Check Out My Advanced Tactics Here!

It is VITALLY important you develop this skill,
otherwise you will have an extremely hard time
meeting women and getting them to go out with you.

My book makes it so simple, a child could do it.
And that means you can do it too!

No More Mr. Nice Guy -- The Right Attitude For Massive Attraction

2009-06-11T16:01:00.001-07:00

Most guys know that Jerks seem to have some sort
of "magical" ability to attract super hot
women.

But do you think it's possible to generate massive
attraction with women without having to be a
jerk?

GOOD NEWS: It is possible!

Here's the secret...

1. Be strong
2. Be confident
3. Be MASCULINE!

When you're able to project your masculinity,
you create an "aura" of attraction that actually
draws women to you like you were wearing a suit
made of MONEY!

Being masculine is about being naturally confident,
attractive, and alpha - without really having to
change who you are, or how you act around girls.

Trust me, this is a POWERFUL concept.

If you'd like to learn more about how to harness
the power of your masculinity right now, and get
more chicks approaching YOU than you know what
to do with, check this out:

Discover Massive Attraction Secrets Here!

How To Be Confident Around Women

2009-06-11T11:52:00.000-07:00

Meet Women Mini-Course #2: How To Be Confident Around Women

Well, you made it to Day 2 of this ecourse!

I hope you got a lot out of lesson 1. The
ability to read a woman's body language is
probably the second most important thing to
know if you want to increase your success
with the ladies.

Wait a minute, did I just say "SECOND most
important thing to know?"

Yes I did.

Because the A-#1 most important thing to
have if you want to radically supercharge
your success with women is:

CONFIDENCE.

I know, I know, you've heard this puppy
before. "Every woman is attracted to a
confident guy" right?

Well, yes, this is right. Ask any girl,
and they will always tell you that confidence
is an incredibly attractive trait in a man.

But here's the problem with this statement
and why most guys roll their eyes when
they hear it...

NO ONE EVER TELLS YOU HOW TO BE CONFIDENT!

Most books will give you some artsy-fartsy
psychobabble about what you need to do to
be more confident, like imagining yourself
to be 50 feet tall and shining with power.

Other products might tell you to "fake it
until you make it" and just try to act
confident around women when you're really
scared silly deep inside.

The problem with these tactics is that
THEY DON'T WORK!

Seriously, you'd be better off watching
linoleum peel than try to follow that
advice.

The time you spend mentally masturbating
as you imagine yourself being really giant
and glistening with power is much better
spent doing things that will actually get
you results once you open your eyes.

And faking confidence will backfire on
you the second you get rejected, and you're
going to feel like a fake, a loser, and a
complete failure with women.

Then you'll spend the next day/week/month
beating yourself up and wallowing in self
pity.

Both of these tactics are COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE
to getting more success with women.

So that brings us back to where we started:
How do you become more confident?

Well, there is a way to do it. But it's
not simple OR fast acting.

In fact, it's quite hard.

I hesitate to bring it up because it's not
something that can be done overnight, so if
you're looking for a quick fix, I'm afraid I
can't help you.

But being confident in yourself is SO IMPORTANT
that I can't ignore this topic completely.

In my course, The Art Of Approaching, I
devoted an entire SECTION to this topic
and teaching you how to truly make a real
change and become more confident in yourself.

And since I can't fit all of it into this
little ecourse, I'll just cover the basics.

First off, I want you to understand that
your lack of confidence comes from your
current BELIEF SYSTEM.

If you get nervous around women, or rehearse
failure or bad things in your mind, it's
because you've TRAINED YOURSELF to believe
that way.

When we're born, we don't have a set of beliefs
pre-installed within us. We are a blank slate!
Completely free of any negative thoughts or
beliefs.

But as we grow up, our experiences and our
upbringing helps to shape that which we
believe about ourselves. Sometimes those
beliefs are correct.

Other times, those beliefs are dead wrong.

For instance, let's say the first time you
liked a girl in first grade, you tried to
kiss her or something, and all the kids made
fun of you for "liking a girl." So you were
ashamed and suffered through all the teasing.

After that, you became afraid to approach a
girl you liked because early on, you learned
to associate that shame you felt when those
kids ridiculed you with approaching a woman
you liked.

See how that works?

That's just one example. There are TONS of
different ways we come to accept
counter-productive beliefs.

The real trick in fixing this and helping
to RE-TRAIN yourself to feel good feelings
and be confident is self-examination.

You have to take a good, hard look at who
you are and what you believe.

Otherwise, you will just keep doing what
you've always done! And if you're reading
this email, chances are what you've been
doing hasn't been working too well for you!

So here's what I want you to do...

Sit down with a piece of paper and a pen,
and think about a problem you have.
For example:

"I get scared when I see a woman I like and
can't talk to them."

Then, analyze your statement and ask:

"Why do I feel that way?"

So let's say you get scared because you think
the girl is going to slap you across the face
and call you a loser. Write that down on
the paper. Then ask yourself:

"Why do I believe that?"

Really THINK about the answer to this question.

Maybe when you were younger, you saw your
big brother get slapped by a woman and
called a loser, so you associated that
reaction with approaching a woman.

Write your answer down.

Once you figure out your answer, then ask
"Is that something that is logical to believe?"

Chances are, the answer is NO.

Then ask yourself: "What should I believe
instead of this?" Then write down your answer.

So in this case, let's say you write down
that you're going to believe that instead
of getting slapped and called a loser, the
woman will smile at you and be happy to
talk to you.

Now, the next time you see a woman you want
to approach, and you feel that fear, you
know it's because of that negative belief you
got from watching your brother at a young age.

Then tell yourself "This woman is going to
smile and be happy to talk to me." Say it
as many times as it takes. Repeat this
belief to yourself over and over until it
overtakes the bad belief, and then go talk
to the girl!

You'll be really surprised at the results
you get from this simple technique.

I could go on for hours on how to build
real confidence.

This is just the tip of the iceberg.

In my course, The Art Of Approaching, I devote
chapter after chapter to just the subject of
retraining yourself to be more confident so
you can not only be more successful with women,
but in ALL areas of your life.

I break it down in a simple, step-by-step
way, and tell you EXACTLY what you have to
do to change all your negative beliefs that
are holding you back.

If you want to be more confident with women,
and stop experiencing all those negative
emotions, download your copy of my course
today here:

Here

You can be reading it in minutes and get
on your way to taking control of your life
today!

And if you really want to get serious with meeting

and dating beautiful women, then you should check

out my advanced series here:

Here!

Think about how much more fun you'll have
once you shed all these terrible beliefs
that are holding you back from getting what
you really want out of life.

P.S. Do you want to know the secrets to getting

women into bed in 3 dates or less? Then check

this out: HERE

The REAL Marriage Killer

2009-06-11T11:32:00.000-07:00

Let's take a moment to review what you learned in the last lesson. In Part I, we discussed how factors beyond your control can affect how likely you are to divorce, including whether or not you're from a broken family, your age at marriage, and whether or not you lived together before marriage. While these factors can make you statistically more or less likely to divorce, they're not determining factors. You personally have an enormous power to influence and control the course of your marriage. By acting the way you want to feel rather than reacting to your situation, you can stop the deterioration of your marriage in its tracks and set
it on the path to healing and recovery.

Sound impossible? It's not, but it is extremely difficult. Most people are highly resistant to change. By now, you've built up patterns of negative behavior in your marriage (even if you thought you were doing nothing wrong), and it will take effort, determination, and absolute commitment to change yourself. Changing yourself is the only way to save your marriage. I'm not going to tell you how to manipulate or change your partner. I
won't validate your need to blame your partner. That's because playing the victim will not save your marriage.

You cannot abdicate responsibility for marital conflict--even if you don't think you're the one "with the problem." That's because every marital conflict has two components: the behavior and the response. For something to cause problems in a marriage, the response to a behavior is more important than the behavior.

In other words, even if you think your partner's actions are causing problems in your marriage, your response to those actions are actually more important to your marriage than the actions themselves.

This can be difficult to grasp fully, so let's look at an example. Mary's husband always promises to bring home the groceries that she needs but always forgets to do so. For Mary, this is inexcusable. His broken promises erode the trust in their marriage. She is sorely tempted to react emotionally to the situation and lash out at her husband every time he comes home empty-handed. But she knows that this response will drive her husband away further.

Instead, she decides to respond proactively and develops a plan of action. The next time her husband forgets to bring home the groceries she needs for dinner, she doesn't blame or criticize him. Instead, she sets her husband to watching the children, gets in the car, and drives to the store to get the groceries she needs.
She enjoys her small outing without feeling bitter. Although they have a late dinner that night, her husband sees that she's not angry with him.

After a few more times like this, Mary realizes that the most important goal in the situation is to have what she needs to make her family dinner--no matter who gets the groceries. Her husband realizes that not having the groceries does indeed inconvenience Mary. As a result, her husband eventually asks her what they could
do so that one of them doesn't have to get the groceries during the week. He confesses that he doesn't get the groceries because he is tired after work and hates having to make a detour to the store. As a result, Mary and her husband decide to plan better and spend a bit more time on their weekend shopping trip so that they don't run out of food mid-week.

Mary's response transformed a high-tension situation into a manageable one--even though her husband's behavior didn't change. Was Mary's response an easy one to make? No. She wanted to react emotionally, and it took an enormous amount of self-control not to give into the temptation to blame him or feel resentful. It took time and creativity to decide the best plan of action in the situation. Mary knew that it would have been so much easier just to give in to her anger and expect her husband to change, but she made the effort because she valued her marriage.

As I said before and will say many more times again, saving your marriage takes effort, dedication, and absolute commitment. It's not easy, but an easy solution is like a band-aid. It will hide the wounds but won't keep your marriage from getting injured again and again.

To measure your commitment to saving your marriage, consider this story. I often ask people how much effort they put into losing weight. One woman told me that she'd bought dozens of books, tried a hundred and one diets, and even pumped money into a professional weight-loss program. Yet this very same woman had an unfulfilling marriage with a husband who could do no right. "If you put that much money into weight loss," I told her, "why do you put less effort into saving your marriage?" She was stunned. She'd expected her husband to change to save their marriage; she didn't think that she had to do anything.

What Happens when Love Dies

When you don't put effort into your relationship, love dies. Remember that a marriage either grows or weakens. Think of your marriage like a plant: if you fertilize it, water it, and notice when it is unhealthy, it will thrive. If you leave it to grow on its own, without any attention, it will wither.

One of the most common marital complaints is that, "We're not in love anymore." There are numerous people who file for divorce with the explanation, "I don't love my spouse anymore." Where does love go and how can you get it back?

Let me address the second question first. If you're the partner who's lost those loving feelings, there's a simple and effective answer to your question. Get it back by loving your partner. I first came across this method ten years ago. Stephen R. Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, tells us that
love isn't a feeling; it's an action. If you don't feel warm and affectionate towards your partner, ask yourself a simple question: are you acting warmly and affectionately towards your partner? If not, there's your solution.

You cannot maintain feelings of love and affection unless you consistently act in a loving way towards your partner. This means that you listen to your partner. You compliment and verbally appreciate your partner. You think of a million and one ways to show your partner how much you respect, admire, trust, and believe
in him or her. Maybe you give your partner a card on obscure holidays; maybe you surprise your partner by washing his or her car, or by initiating a back rub on a quiet weekday night. You'll learn more about this concept in my complete Save My Marriage Today! book.

You may not be able to change your feelings by pure force of will, but you can change your behavior. Luckily, changing your behavior is often all it takes to change your feelings. If you don't love your partner anymore, love your partner even more. It's not a contradiction. Act out the love that you want to feel.

Twenty-five Relationship Killers

If your partner is the one who doesn't love you anymore, don't go looking for blame. You cannot make your partner love you again by arguing, tears, manipulation, or threats. The only way you can recapture your partner's love for you is by being a more lovable person yourself.

Most of us think that we're easy people to love. Love is an emotion: it can be turned on or off, right? Wrong. Love is an action, and unless it is acted out it will die. As a result, you may be resisting being loved without even knowing it.

If you are uncomfortable giving and receiving loving acts, you may be a hard person to love. If you find it more comfortable to criticize than to compliment, you may be a hard person to love. If you shrink away from hugs and avoid kissing in public, you may be a hard person to love. If you show your affection towards your partner by teasing or making fun of him or her, you may be a hard person to love. If you always have to be right and don't listen to your partner, you may be a hard person to love.

Lovable people love others. They are positive people. They enjoy physical intimacy and often initiate it. They trust and believe in their partner. They're proud of their partner, and they make sure their partner knows this. Because they are open and uncritical, their partners know that they can come to them with anything.

Does this sound like you? Do you want it to sound like you?

You may be thinking, "Those types of people are easily taken for the fool." It's true. Lovable people can be taken advantage of. But the one place where no walls should exist is in a marriage. Your partner is not like other people. For intimacy to grow, both of you must be comfortable loving one another--both giving love and
receiving it.

The following relationship killers nip love in the bud. They'll make it impossible for your partner to love you and, as a result, will cause your partner's loving feelings to die. If any of them apply to you, it's up to you to change yourself. You cannot get your partner's love back until you make it easy for him or her to love you.

1. You're disappointed in your partner. Your partner can sense when you are disappointed in him or her, even if you try to hide it. Respecting your partner is a must. You cannot have a healthy marriage if you are disappointed in your partner, period.

2. You're disillusioned with your marriage. Disillusionment is another marriage killer. You may feel as if your marriage hasn't lived up to your expectations. If so, take responsibility for your feelings. Don't blame your partner or your marriage. If your marriage isn't what you want it to be, change it. If you're disillusioned, examine your expectations. Maybe they weren't realistic in the first place. You are responsible for your own
happiness, and blaming your partner for not giving you the marriage you want is a cop-out.

3. You don't respect your partner. In some ways, respect for your partner is even more important than love for your partner. Have you ever noticed how you find it easy to like people who look up to you? When you respect and admire your partner, your partner will feel more loving feelings towards you. If your partner feels as if he or she has to live up to your expectations, constantly disappoints you, or can never get it right, you've failed to show your partner the respect that he or she deserves.

4. You don't like or respect yourself.

5. You don't do what you say you are going to.

6. You let pride get in the way.

7. You always have to be right.

8. You don't listen to your partner.

9. You do things because they annoy your partner.

10. You're dishonest.

11. You have temper tantrums and/or are unable to control your emotions.

12. You are hurtful and put down your partner.

13. You criticize your partner in front of others.

14. You take pride in being difficult to live with.

15. You're unwilling to meet your spouse's requests or compromise.

16. You want your spouse to change who he or she is.

17. You let others get between you and your spouse.

18. You don't fight fair.

19. You want to stay exactly how you are and resist growth.

20. You can't handle stress and take it out on your spouse.

21. You take everything your partner does or says personally.

22. You always see the negative side of things.

23. You refuse to admit there is a problem or seek professional help.

24. You engage in alcohol or substance abuse.

25. You are physically or verbally abusive to your spouse.

How to Face the Truth

If you've made it this far in the course, you realize that transforming yourself into a more loving, lovable person will take a lot of soul-searching and breaking of old habits. To help you, I've included over 30 insightful and thought-provoking exercises in my book, Save My Marriage Today! These exercises will take you
much further and give you the knowledge you need to transform your life. To order Save My Marriage Today! click on the link below.

HERE

What does your ex REALLY want from you?

2009-06-11T11:30:00.001-07:00

Did you know that more than 70% of men can't answer

this question? What's worse is that most women
can't either. So with this in mind is it any wonder
you find yourself not being able to get through to
your girl and do or say the things that will get
you back together? Or worse... doing the things that
push her further away?

I touched upon this matter in the report I sent you
yesterday on page 3 where I wrote,

"...avoiding crucial mistakes while attempting to
get an ex-girlfriend back is just as important -
if not more important - as taking the right approach."

And if you haven't had a chance to read it yet,
here's the link once again:

HERE

Well now I'm going to let you in on a little *secret*.
This is something I consider to be the SECOND MOST
IMPORTANT factor in getting your girlfriend back:

*** Never listen to what a woman says...
Watch what she does instead

Now I could write a whole book on that topic
(in fact, I already have and you can learn more about
it here: HERE),
but in the mean time, let me give you a little more
insight into that statement.

Everything that's going on in your breakup right
now is the result of mixed signals. For example, has
she told you she still loves you?

What does this do to you? It gets your hopes up and
gets you thinking there's a good chance you'll be
together again. But when you try to make amends she
hits you with a bunch of reasons why it's better to
remain friends. The harder you try, the more she
pulls away.

But if you could just "read between the lines" you
would see that what's really happening is that she
loves and wants to be with the person she met in
the first place - not the person this breakup has
led you to become.

So what's the solution here? It's to get yourself
back in the same shape as when you first met her.
Think about it? Were you thinking and acting like
this on your first dates? Didn't think so...

Now this requires you to step back from your
situation, look at it from a realistic point of view
(see Common Mistake #1 in the report) and then just
put the pieces of the puzzle together:

* What were you like before you got together?
* How did you change during the relationship?
* What has this breakup ultimately turned you into?

Taking the time to really think about and answer
those questions and then taking actions to correct
the obvious mistakes you made on your part is a
crucial step to getting her back.

Here is Biggest Breakup Mistakes, Part 1

2009-06-10T11:23:00.001-07:00

BREAKUP MISTAKE #1: Not Seeing Your Situation Objectively.

In my opinion this is the number one mistake people make that kills their chances of getting back together with their loved ones.

Let's face it, as humans, we love ourselves. You could even say it's instinctual and necessary for our survival.

My dad used to tell me to stick up for myself because if I didn't look after myself, no one would. And I believe he was right.

We all need to look out for ourselves.

But relationships make this tricky. Because in a relationship, we're supposed to look out for the other person more than ourselves, and if the other person is doing the same, then you can have really enjoy a healthy and rewarding relationship.

But when a relationship ends, all bets are off. Immediately we revert back to looking out for numero uno.

We can't help it. We feel hurt and sad and we have a real tough time
seeing past the pain and hurt we are feeling.

Our emotions present a barrier to an objective analysis of the real situation. What
we need is objectivity.

Objectivity means being able to see reality. If you're going to change your situation, you need to be able to see the situation for what it really is and not just your from own perceptions.

When you see things objectively, you can more easily spot errors and see clear solutions to problems. When you can easily spot problems and solutions like this, you can create a road map to reconciliation.

OK, so how do you do this?

I believe there are a few different ways to seek out objectivity.

1.THE QUICK WAY TO OBJECTIVITY:

Seek the advice of a friend you trust. Tell your friend you really need their honesty and not to worry about hurting your feelings. You need an honest opinion.

Outsiders can easily see the situation for what it is because their feelings and emotions are not wrapped up in it.

A true friend can let you know if you're being pigheaded or if your actions led to your breakup. They can also shed light on your ex and explain why that person's point of view in a way that makes sense to you.

This is invaluable and if you have a friend who can be honest and helpful like this, take advantage of it as soon as you can.

2. ANOTHER QUICK WAY TO OBJECTIVITY:

Try to ask yourself objective questions. Am I being fair? Is my ex being fair? What reason has my ex given me for breaking up? Have I done anything to
lead my ex to that conclusion? If so, can I correct it? If not, is my ex being truthful with me?

You may or may not have an "a-ha" moment where you realize exactly what the problem is and how to fix it.

But hopefully by answering plenty of objective questions honestly, you can flesh out a clearer picture of what is really happening.

It's sort of like fixing a car engine. You may know it's not working, but you're need to actually lift up the hood to get a good look at what's going on before you can even think about repairing it.

3. TRAIN YOURSELF TO THINK OBJECTIVELY:

This is a method that civilizations have used for centuries. It takes some time to master but when you do you can easily make yourself over, changing or improving your personality and even character at will.

Just before you go to bed, lie down in your bed and begin to review your breakup in reverse order. So start with the present, and work your way backwards.

And do so by imagining your life on a movie screen. In this way, you are an outsider looking in on your life.

And you must be as objective as an outsider would. You cannot make excuses for yourself. If you can see yourself with no emotional or egotistical attachments,
you can see the complete truth in the situation.

The more objective you are, the clearer the truth will become.

To begin, think of the last significant occurrence that happened. What were your thoughts and emotions at the time? How did you react and what did you both say?
Think of what happened immediately after this occurrence. Were your actions in line with your own standards?

If not, try to figure out why you behaved as you did as objectively as you can, without justification or rationalization.

As you see each event or occurrence, substitute the errors you've made with the correct behavior and follow your "movie" through to see how it might have played out. As you do this you will be able to identify problems and even patterns of behavior so that you can make positive changes.

This is a great self-improvement tool that allows us to identify problems and right our wrongs.

Can you see how this can completely transform your relationship? Not only with your lover, but with friends, family, and even work relationships.

This is one of many techniques you'll find in Win Back Love: How To
Win Back The Love Of Your Life - HERE

Practice this technique each night and you can make extremely positive changes in your life. After a couple weeks using this technique, it will become second-nature to you and you will have a tool at your disposal for self evaluation and improvement, not only in your relationships but in all aspects of your life.

You will benefit from objectivity by living a more meaningful life, filled with purpose.
You will be able to easily find solutions to your problems as they truly are, not as how you perceive them based on your emotions.

And you will find a calm peace come into your heart and mind as your life continues to improve.

Learning and correcting the biggest breakup mistakes is the first step to getting back together with your true love.

In Win Back Love, I lay out a potent strategy proven to work. It's
like having a complete master plan to get your special someone back.

Grab it now HERE.

Stay tuned for the next installment of BIGGEST BREAKUP MISTAKES;
there are 9 more on the way!

How To Meet More Women In Just 7 Days...

2009-06-10T11:10:00.001-07:00

You should congratulate yourself.

Seriously, you should reach around and pat
yourself on the back.

Why?

Because you've just done what 99.9% of other
men WON'T do.

You took steps to improve your love life.

You know, it always surprised me how much people
are willing to just stay where they're at in life
and keep doing what isn't working, because they're
either too lazy or too afraid to change!

But you... you, my friend, know that there's
something that's not quite right about the
results you're getting and you decided to DO
something about it!

That makes you special.

That makes you a WINNER.

And because you've proven yourself to be serious
about improving your love life by signing up for
this special e-course, I'm going to give you some
nuggets of wisdom to get you going in the right
direction.

If you actually take the information I'm going to
give you to heart, and DO WHAT I TELL YOU, by the
end of the next seven days, you should see an
improvement in your love life.

In this first part of the course, I'm going to
talk about the single most important skill you
can develop to become a true ladies man.

If you learn anything from this e-course,
learn this...

***KNOWING HOW TO MEET WOMEN IS THE SINGLE
MOST IMPORTANT SKILL YOU CAN POSSESS TO
ENSURE A HAPPY AND FULFILLING LOVE LIFE!***

Here's the low-down on what most guys do (let me
know if this sounds familiar):

They wake up, go to work, look at women they
find attractive throughout the day, imagining
what it'd be like to have a steamy rendezvous
with them, but go on about their day until it's
time for them to go back home.

Then at home, they either stay in all night,
or go out with some friends to "meet women"
but end up spending most of the night hanging
with their buddies and just looking at all
the women around them instead of actually
talking to them because they're too scared
or nervous.

Either way, the day ends as it began -- with
them all alone!

And this cycle repeats again, and again, and
again.

Now I ask you: Is that any way to live?

(The answer to that question should be a big,
fat, resounding NO!!!!!)

But guess what?

The majority of men out there do this exact
same routine every day!

And when they are faced with an opportunity
to meet a woman, a good HALF of those guys
clam up, get nervous, don't know what to say,
don't know what to do, and imagine getting
brutally rejected by the woman they want.

This is because:

MOST MEN HAVE TRAINED THEMSELVES TO FAIL!

I am not kidding. Something happened along
the way in most men's development as an adult
that trained them to feel negative emotions
as opposed to positive feelings when it comes
to women.

They've learned to embrace insecurity instead
of confidence. Fear instead of fun. And
failure instead of success.

Like a beaten dog whipped by it's master, these
men choose to cower and live in misery rather
than enjoy all the good stuff that comes
with meeting a woman for the first time.

And remember, if you can't MEET a woman, you
will never:

Enjoy her company
Find out what kind of person she is
Take her on a date
Make out with her
Have sex with her
Have a relationship with her
Marry her

All this is impossible to do with someone
you've never met!

So the purpose of this mini-course (and my
course The Art Of Approaching) is to teach
you every single last little aspect of how
to meet a woman. This includes:

Learning to read female body language
Training yourself to be confident around women
Learning how to start conversations with women
How to flirt with a woman to get her attracted to you
What you need to do to engage her imagination
How to keep your conversation going and set up the next date
How to improve your social life so meeting women becomes insanely easy

You mix these seven facets together, and you
got yourself one hell of a recipe for success!

So let's touch base on the first step,
which is learning to read female body
language.

One of the best pieces of advice I ever got
from a friend of mine that's good with
women is this:

"Don't listen to what a person says. Look
at what they do! That will always reveal
their true motives."

This is doubley true when it comes to women.

Remember: Most women have no idea what they
really want!

So never listen to what they tell you when it
comes to what kind of men they like, because
they're susceptible to how men make them FEEL.

If a woman says she likes "Tall guys," and
you're 5'2, you're NOT out of the ball game.
Maybe she likes tall guys because tall guys
make her feel safe.

That means all you have to do is make this
girl feel safe with you, and you're on the
same playing field as a guy twice your size.

With that said, pay attention to the signals
a woman's body sends out, and you will always,
always, ALWAYS know if you're wasting your
time, if what you're doing is working, if she's
open to be approached, etc.

When it comes to body language, always
remember this GOLDEN RULE:

***Pay Attention To Her Eyes***

The eyes are the window to the soul, and
they will always betray what a person is
really feeling. If you know how to use eye
contact properly, you will experience
amazing results with women.

Here's something I want you to try...

The next time you go out, make it a point
to make EYE CONTACT with every girl you see.
If you see a girl you like, lock your eyes on
her until she makes eye contact with you.

When this happens, raise your eyebrows at
her (you know, the ol' eyebrow wink!), and
follow that with a smile.

Pay attention to her response.

If she smiles back, holds eye contact a
little longer, and looks away (in typical
sideways glance fashion), and keeps glancing
back at you, guess what? She's open to
you meeting her!

But if she shows no expression and looks
away quickly, never bothering to look in
your direction again, you'll be wasting your
time on her!

So now you know it's best to move on and
find another women who WILL enjoy your
company.

Just by using this simple trick, you'll
see your success rate with women skyrocket!

I know guys who just use this method of
meeting women and never, ever, EVER get
rejected.

In my course, The Art Of Approaching, I go
into great detail of every little body
language cue you can look for to tell if
a woman is not only open to meeting you,
but also if she's attracted to you and
ready to be kissed!

When you know the signs to look for, you can
be completely confident that you will never
be rejected!

If you'd like to learn more about the
secrets to sexual body language, check
out my course at:

Check Out The Art Of Approaching Here

And if you REALLY want to have amazing
success with women, you should check out
my advanced techniques here:

Learn My Advanced Tactics Here!

The next time you go out to meet women,
just try this tactic and see how many
women respond!

And if you're up for it, walk up to
them and say "Hi!" You'll be surprised
at just how many women are open to
being met.

Wishing you success with women

6-PART MINI-COURSE - DAY 1

2009-06-10T11:07:00.000-07:00

Risk Factors for Divorce and Why You Should Ignore Them

by Amy Waterman

If your marriage is struggling, unhappy, or on the verge of divorce, you need to have the best information available at your fingertips. You need to know what factors could be working against your marriage right now, even if you see nothing wrong. Many people believe that their marriage is working fine until their spouse gives them the wake-up call.

Marriages either grow or weaken: they don't stay static. That means that a secure marriage isn't one where things are always the same. A solid marriage is one in which you never stop putting in effort to make it better and better.

You wouldn't be visiting the Save My Marriage Today! website unless your marriage was in crisis. This six-part course is intended as an eye-opener to show you why your marriage may have gotten to this point and what behaviors may be leading you further down the path to divorce. If you're going to restore, heal, and strengthen your marriage, you HAVE to think frankly about the reasons your marriage isn't satisfying both you and your partner. That's where this course can help.

Top Six Predictors of Divorce

Let's start out with the things that you can't change. Some marriages start off with a number of challenges arrayed against them; other marriages have factors in their favor. If any of the following situations apply to you and your partner, don't despair. These are risk factors--not determining factors. It may just mean
that you need extra help (such as professional counseling) to work through the issues that you and your partner are facing.

1. You married in your teens.

Study after study shows that age at marriage is one of the most powerful and consistent predictors of marital stability. If you marry before you turn twenty, you are much likely to divorce.

2. You lived together before marriage.

Many young people today believe that living together before marrying will test their compatibility and keep them from making a mistake by marrying someone they don't know fully. Despite the widespread prevalence of this belief, the evidence just doesn't back it up. Even though over half of all first marriages are preceded by a period of living together, don't do it just because everyone else is doing it. Living together before marriage
considerably increases your chances of eventually divorcing--unless you were already engaged beforehand and marry soon after moving in together.

3. Your parents or your partner's parents were divorced.

Children of divorced parents are more likely to divorce themselves (as well as less likely to marry in the first place). This risk can be mitigated if one of you comes from a happy, intact family. If both you and your partner come from broken homes, the divorce risk soars.

4. You have a child together before marriage.

On a positive note, couples with children have a slightly lower risk of divorce than childless couples, if their first child is born seven months or more after they marry. Having a child together before that period will increases your risk of divorce.

5. You haven't been married long.

The first two years of a marriage are critical, and half of all divorces occur by the seventh year of a marriage. The longer you've been married, the more likely you are to stay married.

6. Your annual income is under $25,000.

Money matters. Financial strains often break up marriages, as when money is tight, arguments and marital tensions increase. In fact, the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers considers financial problems to be one of the five most common reasons for divorce (along with poor communication, lack of marital commitment,
infidelity, and a dramatic change in priorities.)

Top Six Predictors of a Long-Lasting Marriage

If you're facing challenges in your marriage, it may be comforting to know that you have some factors in your favor. These predictors are limited to factors that were set in place when you married and don't include aspects like good communication and conflict resolution skills.

1. You were both older when you married.

Getting married over the age of twenty-five (as opposed to your teens) will decrease your chances of divorce. This is because older individuals tend to be more mature, clearer about what they're looking for in a partner, and have more economic stability.

2. You share the same religion or belief system.

Sharing a religion is a powerful bond, because it brings you and your partner together on a spiritual level and gives your marriage a sense of a higher purpose. When you are both active in a religion, you have counseling and a strong support network available to foster you through difficult times in your marriage.
Too, your shared values and life goals sustain your marriage and keep you growing together rather than apart.

3. You have some higher education.

A college degree isn't necessary to increase your chances of a long-lasting marriage, but some higher education will decrease your chances of divorce considerably with comparison to a high-school dropout.

4. Your parents are still together.

If you grew up in an intact family, your chances of divorce are less in comparison to someone who grew up with divorced parents. This is because so much of what we learn about marriage and marital behavior comes from watching our parents. If our parents developed strategies for staying together, we'll absorb those strategies in childhood and be able to use them ourselves in our adult relationships.

5. Your income is above $50,000.

Couples with medium to high incomes tend to experience less strife over money management. They have the financial security to worry less about making a living and more about making a life.

6. You have a child together.

Couples with children have a lower risk of divorce compared to childless couples. However, be warned: the most stressful time in a marriage is after the birth of the first child. That's why it's so important that the first child is born only after the marriage has developed a strong foundation.

The Keys to a Successful Marriage

According to Michael P. Johnson, professor of sociology at Penn State, there are three things that keep a person in a marriage: people want to stay, they feel they ought to stay, and/or they have to stay. This combination of personal, moral, and structural commitment serves to keep people in marriages.

Notice that commitment keeps people in marriage--not happiness. Dr. Ted Huston of the University of Texas Austin studied couples from courtship to marriage. His ten-year-plus study exploded many popular misconceptions about love. For example, he found that many recently wed couples did not experience newlywed bliss; in fact, couples whose marriages began with "Hollywood romance" intensity soon burned out. A couple expecting wedded bliss every day of their lives was actually more likely to divorce than a couple with
a less exciting relationship, because they were more likely to consider divorce when those intense feelings subsided. Does that mean that less exciting, even lackluster relationships last? They do indeed, perhaps because they have less far to fall.

Research shows that unhappy periods in a marriage are not indicative of future unhappiness. In fact, one study showed that 86% of unhappily married couples who stayed with their marriage were happier five years later--three fifths of whom were "quite" or "very happy."

According to the 2004 "State of Our Unions" report by the National Marriage Project, the percentage of married people 18 or older who said that their marriage was very happy has declined over the last quarter century, from about 69% in the mid 1970s to 64% for men and 60% for women today. That's less than two-thirds of the married population who considers themselves very happy in their relationship. Clearly, you don't have to be blissfully in love or very happy for your relationship to last. What do you need?

It's not love and luck. It's commitment and companionship. Commitment means that you have powerful personal, moral, and structural reasons to stay in the relationship. Companionship means that you and your partner form a unified team against whatever challenges life hands you. Team members may fight, disagree, and encounter stalemates, but they know that their happiness and satisfaction in life depends on the success of the team--not on their individual success.

When Marriage Fails ... Who and How

Contrary to popular belief, it's not men who seek divorce. It's women, by an overwhelming majority. The reasons for this are varied. Part of it is the nature of divorce laws; another part is the fact that men tend to have more problems with marriage-destroying behaviors like alcoholism, affairs, and substance abuse, that cause their wives to seek separation.

Divorce is hard on everyone. The damage divorce causes to children is usually worse than the damage caused by living in a two-parent home with marital difficulties. This is contrary to the popular belief that children are better off if their parents divorce rather than live together. Studies show that only in a minority of
high-conflict situations is this true.

After a divorce, a woman's standard of living can be expected to drop while a man's standard of living may actually improve. Yet men suffer in other ways. Divorced and separated men are two and a half times more likely to commit suicide than married men. This is partially due to the fact that men, unlike women, are less likely to have a strong support network to share their feelings. Whether due to this need for companionship or not, divorced men are more likely to remarry than divorced women, and they're more likely to remarry sooner.

Who Has the Real Power in a Relationship

Regardless of whether you're a man or a woman, whether you pay the bills or stay at home, or whether you need your spouse more than your spouse needs you, there is only one person in control of any relationship. That person has the power to turn a relationship around or run it into the ground. And that person usually never realizes how much power he/she wields until it is too late.

That person is you.

You have the choice to either react to the situation you're in (by complaining about your marriage, allowing yourself to be swamped by negative emotions, or feeling out of control), or to take responsibility and choose your actions. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can hurt you without your consent."

Even if you cannot change your partner's behavior, you can choose how you respond to that behavior. You can internalize the blame, the hurt, and the criticism, or you can take responsibility for your own feelings and choose to act the way you want to feel.

Think again about that last concept. You should act the way you want to feel. If you want to feel more loving towards your spouse, act more loving. If you want to feel happier in your marriage, smile more and express gratitude for the good things in your marriage. It's one of the strangest aspects of human psychology that the more you act the way you want to feel (thankful, peaceful, loving, affectionate, etc.) the more you will begin to feel that way.

Few people realize this. When a marriage begins to crumble, their first instinct is to act out their emotions. They feel hurt, so they lash out. They feel criticized, so they become defensive. They feel vulnerable, so they close up. These are reactions, not actions. Your feelings should NOT make you act in ways that you don't want to.

You have the power to transform your marriage, even if your partner doesn't want to. That's because your behavior has an enormous influence on your partner, to the point that married people actually grow alike over time. We can't help but pick up our partner's moods, preferences, and ways of saying certain things. If you transform yourself--your attitude, the way you communicate, how often you show love and affection--your partner will be incapable of resisting. A happy, fulfilling relationship begins with you. And in the next part of this mini-course, I'll show you how to start achieving it.